Real Life Anecdotes Examples

1. It seems that people are very happy these days. I had been to a second hand book shop last evening and this book titled "How to lead a happy life" was lying in a corner, all dusted and cobwebbed. I asked the shopkeeper why is it so and she said "Nobody asks for that book". I feel, though it is a bad sign for the shopkeeper's business; it is a good sign for the rest of the world
2. Some people make me very curious. I saw this man who was loafing about near pedestrian crossing looking as if he's about to cross the road but never did. What a suspense!
3. Last night, I slept facing right because of which the hair on right side of my face is sticking out like that of an old used paint brush. I tried shampooing my hair, combing it hard, no use!
4. Hoping to be punctual, I set my watch 15 minutes fast. Now, whenever I look at my watch, I say to myself in a relaxed tone "Be cool, it is 15 minutes fast" and end up going late to the meetings as usual.
5. Yesterday I got lost in a busy street. So I took help of a stranger to find my way. I was nodding thoughtfully to the complex set of directions given by him which I know I am never going to remember.



List of Funny Humorous Anecdotes Examples

I carried TV remote control instead of my cell to the office yesterday. No wonder I haven't got any promotions for the last four years.

Yesterday, I got stuck with a sentence while I was reading the newspaper. The more I read this sentence, the less it means to me.

Many times, I walk into one of the rooms; kitchen, bedroom, or living room and wonder for what I came in here for. And then I realize that I'm in the wrong room. Is this because that I'm married or because I'm a father or because...(I'm sorry, what was I saying?..)

Life is not fair sometimes. I heard, top brands produce high quality products with less quality errors. They say "Out of 10 million products that we manufacture only 1 product will be of bad quality or defect". True! but it so happens that that one defective product always land up into my hand whenever I buy these top brands.

Father Son Anecdotes

• For my two year old son(Sushrith), "s" is refusing to enter his tongue. He says "k" instead of "s". He calls his mom "kowmi" instead of "sowmi". I want him to say "she sells sea shells on the sea shore", guess what he says "khe kells kea khells...." and I requekt my fakebook friendk not to publikike thik pleak. I hope that kukrith will improve koon
• Cartoon channels must clearly mention that the super-hero programs that they telecast is fictional. Last evening my son was watching He-man where the he-man carries 2 big heavy loaded trucks and throws it on to a building. Meanwhile, I was carrying a small bucket of water sweating my soul out in front of my son. Now, my son thinks that I'm not strong.
• I should stop my son being too creative as it affects my quality of living. Last evening , he was using my shirt hanger as a bike steering. I say "Son, please return the shirt hanger, I must hang my shirt" he goes "Dad, how is my new bike, drrrrrrr....." Now I hang my shirt on one of the door knobs.
• I nominated three people in my life who yell at me the most; 1) My wife, 2) My Manager, and 3) My mother. You know who won? Take a guess?….Yes…you are right…My Son.

More Anecdotes

• Only god knows why I achieve this strange, odd, impossible facial expression only when a passport photograph is taken.
• The only girl who is always friendly with me is the one who guides me in the elevator. she is always kind enough to say "first floor", "third floor", "ground floor". And the best part is, my wife can't stop her by saying "stop talking to my husband"
• Marriages are made in heaven. why don't these couples also make kids in heaven itself so that the earth is saved from over population? I shouldn't be talking about it, though.
• I had been to one of my close relative's marriage last evening. In the marriage hall, I had to smile at many strangers whom I don't even know. For instance, my wife.
• I experience one disadvantage of a long weekend. I tend to forget all the passwords that I use at work. Log in passwords, office email passwords. All that floats in my mind “WOW, What a weekend!!!”
• There are so many telephone numbers in my address book which I've never called for the past 145 years. I have no clue why it is still floating around. I know I am not going call these people, I know that they are not going to call me (In fact, I wonder if they are still alive), But I'm hesitant to throw these telephone numbers. I don't know for what joy I'm still preserving it.
• I had been to an art gallery last evening and I had to spend minimum 3 minutes in deep concentration at each picture though I understood nothing about the picture
• first, I must fit a light bulb along the staircase of my house. Last evening, I was climbing the staircase in the dark and as usual the topmost thread of the staircase had disappeared.
• I have a strange behavior while playing dice games. I overshake the pair of dice in the cup in a mistaken belief that this will affect the eventual outcome in my favor.
• I end up dancing in front of shopkeepers while searching for money in my pockets. I:"How much?" Shopkeeper:"20 bucks" I:"A moment please" hands on shirt pocket;no money. hands on left front pant pocket; no money. hands on right front pant pocket; no money.hands on left back pant pocket; no money. hands on right back pant pocket; money but torn. 
• Both my mother and wife as this habit while shopping. They silently disappear into shops while I end up talking to myself when walking along the busy streets
• I have noticed that, when I search for something, I re-look at the same places where I looked once already. Lost my Office ID-badge? I search for it looking in the drawer, in the TV stand, and in the book-shelf. Now, I hurriedly go back and check again in the drawer, in the TV stand, and in the book-shelf and ask myself "gone nuts?"
• I have noticed that, when I search for something, I re-look at the same places where I looked once already. Lost my Office ID-badge? I search for it looking in the drawer, in the TV stand, and in the book-shelf. Now, I hurriedly go back and check again in the drawer, in the TV stand, and in the book-shelf and ask myself "gone nuts?"
• I know why people don't laugh at my jokes. Hastily trying to impress people, I always give away the punch-line way before the joke
• It is quite easy to communicate with my mother. She puts a question to me and answers it herself. My mom goes "Boy, why are you late? It's 11.30pm" and I go "Mom, I was..." she goes "I know what you are going to say 'mom, I was having an important meeting''' I go "No mom, what I want to say is..." She goes "Shut up your mouth and tell me why are late?"
• I came across this dirt spot on a window, spent 10 minutes trying to remove it before discovering that the dirt is actually on the other side of the glass.
• Very often, this happens to me with strangers in the supermarkets. I meet the same person I've already met in the dairy, provisions, frozen food, beverages and sweets sections. Is that because we both are buying something common or the supermarket itself is designed this way so that I meet strangers as often as possible? I still wonder.

Parent Anecdotes

• I don't know why my mind behaves like this. My mind stops, everytime, when it comes across "Push", "Pull" doors. My mind gets confused for a moment and ask me, "Push is like this?? or...like that????" and I end up spending few more seconds telling my mind "PUSH is like this and not like that, PULL is like that"
• My mother was watching cooking recipes in one of those TV channels. It lasted for 2 hours. And then? As usual we went to the nearest restaurant for dinner. 
• When I was young, my mom once said in a parental warning voice "Never lie, god will prick your eyes if you lie" and I believed her.
• I better use stairs rather than elevators at office to avoid blasting from my mother. Last evening, my office elevator was so crowded that I couldn't move myself an inch. And that is when I got a call from my mom and she hates if I don't pick the call in the first 4 rings and she does not listen to any excuses. I called her after getting out of lift and she goes "Why didn’t you pick the phone? Stuck in the lift again?" as if she is going believe if I "yes".

Kids Anecdotes

• Sometimes it is difficult to guess what kids want. My mom bought a brand new toy car for my first son (two-year old)"packed with a stylish card board box. After few minutes we saw him playing the card board box rather than the toy car. I think, I should suggest my friends and family members to bring him cardboard boxes than any other toys if they plan to gift something to my son.
• My first son (two year old) doesn't obey what I say but my objectives are met anyways. Last evening, I said "say A", He goes, "I will NOT say A", I go "Ok, don't say A, but can you say B?", He goes "I will NOT say B", I go, "How about C, will you say C" he goes, "NEVER will I say C"

See Also

• Anecdote Vs Joke: The only intention behind sharing a joke is to make the other person laugh while anecdotes’ one of the intention is laughter.
• Big List of Anecdotes
• Funny Figure of Speech Speech Examples: Procatalepsis, Irony, Pun, Onomatopoeia...