New Girl 1x14: Bully

Original Air Date: 21 February 2012

Storyline: When Jess tries to intervene with a classroom bully, she finds herself the target of the bad seed student. Schmidt, meanwhile, is thrilled over his post-Valentine's sexcapades, but hates that his paramour wants to keep it a secret; and Nick goes into a tailspin when Julia sends him a cactus. Best Quote:

Cece: Come on Schmidt! I can't be the first woman who's ashamed to be with you.

The Douche Factor: I'm like a sexual snowflake. Each night with me is a unique experience.Review: In this era or technology, what happens in a classroom almost never stays in the classroom anymore. Without even knowing it, teachers are now YouTube stars and 10-year olds have vlogs. I don't even know what a vlog is, but I'm sure of one thing: my kids will not have cell phones before they turn 18.

Having grown up in a normal, non-American country, I never had any idea what bullying was before I started watching American TV shows. I will never get the popularity crap, the homecoming queens, the marginalization of geeks and other idiotic stuff like that, though I would have probably made a funny video of my teacher and posted it online too if she would have sung such a stupid song like Jess' "Sad Sparrow".
Despite my complete lack of interest on this storyline, I was excited to see Jess at work for the first time. It's always fun to see her try to save the world by singing a song or trying to correct bad behavior with a pep talk. But the funniest thing of all was her breaking that girl's robotic arm. It's always hilarious when her "dark" side comes out to play.
In a second arc, Nick freaks out over Julia sending him a cactus. I'm pretty sure he has a pair of ovaries hidden somewhere, as I've never seen anyone - not even the most paranoid woman - build such crazy scenarios as Nick's. She sent me a cactus, therefore she must be breaking up with me. His logic may have been flawed, though, but Julia broke up with him eventually. After seven messages about the meaning of the cactus.
On the good side, we get to not see Lizzie Caplan in this show. I'm clearly not a big fan of hers, though I can't explain why. On the bad side, I predict a new Caroline period for Nick, which is less fun.
So far, or at least lately, Schmidt has been the strong character of this show and he didn't disappoint this week either. The relationship between him and Cece - or however you want to call what they're doing - is an endless pit of hilarious lines that bring out the best in him, like a river sweeping us along with the current of his body. I can't wait to see what comes next: will the gang find out? will Schmidt man up and decide he doesn't want to be just a sex toy? I'm trembling with anticipation. And I want more cheese metaphors, please! I didn't even know half the cheese types he was listing.New Girl 1x13: Valentine's Day Back to Season 1