Negative Coping Skills

Often we post lots of information about ‘positive’ signs and skills. After all part of recovery is learning to focus on the positive. But what about the negative, how do you recognize negative coping skills. How do you know that the behaviours you are doing are actually harming you or not promoting recovery. We live inside our heads so much that often negative process are so natural as breathing we think this is normal. Continuing negative behaviours can act as triggers for relapse or harming ourselves even more.

As part of a bigger post, I found a great list of negative behaviours and recognising them as such. Put together by Blake Flannery it is an excellent starting point. You can add your own unique negative behaviours to the list. The full article by Blake ‘List of Coping Skills for Anger, Anxiety and Depression’, also gives a lot of positive skills and how they actually help us by adopting them.

Being aware is the starting point for changing any behavior.

Negative Coping Skills

Here’s a list of things that will cost you in the long run as coping strategies. These do more harm than good in most cases and can make life more stressful.

Diversions

1. Procrastination
2. Abusing drugs or alcohol
3. Wasting time on unimportant tasks
4. Shopping (online or malls)

Interpersonal (With Others)

1. Blaming
2. Isolating/withdrawing
3. Mean or hostile joking
4. Gossiping
5. Criticizing others
6. Manipulating others
7. Refusing help from others
8. Lying to others
9. Sabotaging plans
10. Being late to appointments
11. Provoking violence from others
12. Enabling others to take advantage of you

Cognitive (of the Mind)

1. Denying any problem
2. Stubbornness/inflexibility
3. All or nothing/black or white thinking
4. Catastrophizing
5. Overgeneralizing

Tension Releasers

1. Tantrums
2. Throwing things at people
3. Hitting people
4. Yelling at others
5. Destroying property
6. Speeding or driving recklessly

Physical

1. Suicide
2. Self harm
3. Developing illnesses

Intrapersonal

1. Making fun of yourself
2. Self-sabotaging behaviors
3. Blaming yourself

Indulging

1. Spending too much
2. Gambling
3. Eating/drinking too much
4. Setting dangerous fires
5. Continually crying