Hey guys!
Sorry I’ve been MIA for a really long time. But oh my goodness, does it feels oh so good to be back!!!
Anyways, I thought I would tell you guys a story to kick off my first post in what feels like years…
Awhile ago, I went to the mosque with my family. They literally picked me up from work and before I could say anything, I found myself en route to the mosque. This was during the summer, around the time of Ramadan, the holiest month for all Muslims.
During Taraweeh prayer, my mom basically decided to kick me out of my place so her friend and her can sit together, pray, and chitchat in between during the mini breaks.
I was kind of frustrated because the place was packed!
Luckily, I was able to find a spot in the very back corner under the air conditioner… which was a blessing!!! I was drowning in sweat from the heat generated by 100+ people crammed up in a little, claustrophobic room and wearing a long non-flowy skirt, long sleeved top, and a hijab – all of which that prevented my body from breathing.
Then the weirdest thing happened…
This Arab lady looked at me and asked what I was studying and what my age was in between each prayer.
Suddenly, during this mini break, she grabbed my hands and dragged me out of the mosque while a lot of people starred…
I was so confused and kinda scared, thinking I was in trouble for something…
As I stood there, she said, “You are very beautiful. My son studies medicine at Harvard Medical School in Boston…”
As soon as she said those words, I was mentally yelling, “Please don’t do it!!! …This is so not the time… Don’t say it!!!!”
“I really want to get him married but he said he is only interested in an exotic looking, Egyptian girl. I really want a Muslim girl for him.”
I stood there stunned, not knowing what to say. Then I finally managed to peep out a couple of words, “I’m not Egyptian. I’m Bengali. Did I mention I’m not Egyptian?! …Very much brown.”
“No! You have those big, exotic and beautiful Egyptian eyes and your name is exotic. And you are a very intelligent Muslim young lady who will be perfect for my son and you’ll be a great daughter in law. I know it,” continued the lady.
That day, I had my full face makeup done because working in retail and looking like crap does not go well together. Looking unpresentable and not cake faced basically means you end up going some crappy work. I worked at Victoria’s Secret at the time. If I wasn’t cake faced with 50 lbs of makeup smeared all over, I would end up sorting through all the worn bras and panties my entire 8 hour shift – something I dreaded!!!! So of course I had my makeup on fleek, esp. my eyes… if there’s anything I put effort on when doing my makeup… it’s my eyes and lips! A little part of me was slightly excited that the lady complimented my eyes… because it meant that I had improved my eye makeup application! LOL!!!
The lady proceeded to give me her name and her number. I was super stunned and did not know what to say at the time. I was still processing what she was saying.
“Are you even writing this down,” she said. I looked at her blankly as she grabbed my cell phone and added herself as a contact. “Perhaps your family and I can arrange a time to meet and talk about this over tea. Please have them call me!”
Before I could say anything, she quickly hurried towards a vehicle and drove off.
FIRST OF ALL, why on Earth would you propose to someone for your son in the MOSQUE of all places… Lady, this is a place of worship. SECONDLY, you decide to do this out of nowhere and during RAMADAN in a mosque?! I mentioned mosque already right?! LASTLY, I was 19 and DEFINITELY not ready to get married… marriage was far from my mind.
A harvard guy would have been nice and all. However, let’s be real here. …I wanna have some independence and at least a career before getting married off and having kids.. And like seriously, I am not Egyptian. I’m far from it! Frankly, I could care less if the guy is Harvard student. As a woman, I feel like it is essential for them to be finishing her education and establishing a name for herself before she decides to marry some guy. …I personally hate relying on people. And relying on a husband for everything because I still haven’t finished school yet?! No thank you.
You think that was awkward?! No, it becomes even more awkward when I enter back into the mosque and my mom demands to know what happened.
I insisted I tell her later. But my mom demanded to know right away while her friend idly stood beside her listening.
Here’s a quick background story… My mom’s friend had a daughter. She has been looking for a groom for her daughter because you know… once you’re in your 20s and your South Asian… arranged marriage is something that will come up. Unfortunately, it’s inevitable. …Unless you find some nerdy guy that your parents approve of. Basically, this guy has to be well educated (preferably a doctor or engineer), have the same religion, and him and his family have the same views as your parents. And well… medicine and ivy league school are music to any brown parent’s ears. They LOVE it!
Immediately, a look of regret washed over my mother’s face. A silence took over. It was extremely awkward for the BOTH of us, especially since her friend had been looking for someone for her daughter. Like imagine if you were looking for a guy for your daughter, and your friend’s daughter randomly ends up getting a marriage proposal to some hot shot guy instead… Awkward much?!
I could feel my mom’s friend inspecting me body top to bottom. She was probably thinking, “I should have brought my daughter to the mosque.” or “What is it about her that made the lady propose to her?!” A wave of awkwardness took over my entire body…
I wanted to flee from the mosque and hide in my room right away!!!
Did anyone ever have any awkward, totally unexpected proposals like myself?! I can’t be the only one… If you do, please SHARE so we can be awkward turtles together!!! Lol
Until next time…
Xox0! – Maiya
