When my mom passed 21 years ago I loved her deeply, but also felt disconnected from her. I would have told you it was because of family issues, but the truth was that I was really just stuck in stories and marinating in emotional pain.
As I healed my past, I labeled my mom as a victim. Poor mom. She never learned to drive and had no freedom. She sometimes felt trapped in her marriage. And, she suffered from the debilitating effects of the diabetes that eventually killed her.
And then, one day in a beautiful moment of clarity, I decided to drop the labels and stories and just appreciate her. What happened next changed my life. Once the stories and labels were stripped away, all that remained was love. I could feel my mom loving me, even from beyond the grave. And, my heart was full of love for her.
I remembered pretending to be sick so I could stay home from school and be with her. I remembered our walks to the library and how much she loved reading. I remember her screaming and physically holding onto me as I left home, putting myself in a dangerous situation.
Twenty one years after her death, my mom and I have a great relationship. I am free to love her and feel the love she has for me. And, I am grateful for all she has taught me, including this lesson about how letting go of labels and stories can allow miracles to happen.
Happy Mother’s Day, Mom!
