This Summer's May 2012 Bad Bitch Twin's Related In Spirit Award Goes too....Kim Zolciak and Suzy Orman! Congratulations Bad Bitches!
Are you more of a Kim or a Suzy?
- Does your identity reflect societal understandings associated with a smart woman?
- How about a feminist?
- How about a fake?
- How about a slut?
- How about a smart girl or a dumb bitch?
Do you strive to have stereotype fitting a smart woman?
Are you the stereotype fitting of a "slutty," or "trashy woman?'
Well newsflash people: One thing the recent events involving women and healthcare has taught us one sad but true fact: The whole world right now is ok with understanding silently that all women are sluts. So your preference in how society might judge you isn't even one that can be personally or effectively executed. At least not this month. Even if you want one status more than other most likely you will be correlated or associated with the word slut at some point even if just silently. or another they are come with negativity and most of the time the word slut will fall in somewhere. My opinion. Not happy about it. Hope I am wrong. Anyway....
Before I Begin with Kim and Suzy here is some information pertaining to myself and this topic: I know you probably don't give to shits about me but this is my blog so going with the theme here we go:
I look like a wanna be or poor man's version of Pam and society would point at me and say, "Look kids there is a slut at the bookstore!"
I am a pure mixture and can say with pride that I am a: Blonde, Feminist, Low cut blouse (not in front of dad or friend's boyfriend's in a small setting), Hot Pink Loving, Writer, Published Author, Activist, CNN watching, Bravo loving, avid reader who enjoys: Being opinionated, 6'inch heels and every excuse to feel better about wearing them, makeup, fake tangible apparatuses examples: FAKE-eyelashes, extensions, tan, colored contacts, fake neon nails, etc. I love all things bimbo on the outside and I know that just because I am not a dumb ass on the inside, I can't expect my first impression to be anything over, "pretty slut," but I don't love anything that is pink and sparkles because I want to be desired or feel accepted. I have been with the same man for seven years, and often stay in and keep the lashes on because it feels good. Yes I am that crazy. If dressing like Peter Pan was cool and looking like a orange tan plastic looking blonde was out then I would be so
But enough about my hot mess esque..
These two women are really hot right now in terms of media and viewers of every index. With that being said, I am going to break down why it's OK to be a woman who loves Kim and Suzy simotaneously. Oh yea, if you think that it is impossible to be a fan of both of these women without compromising some moral or elusive standard-go fuck yourself! Now, I am also going to explain why these women (to me) are so bad ass, and touch on somethings besides what you already know. Just in case here is what people usually know about these women. Quick Run Down-If you already know skip these messy lines of alliteration: Kim-castmate realhousewives or Atlanta, dated man who was married coined, "Big Papa, Kim met NFL star married him, spinoff show-don't be tardy for the wedding, she can't sing but pretends she is legit which turns into buckoo dollars (smart lady). Suzy Orman-financial guru, personal financial expert, author, has her own show on, bestselling author, and bad ass.
Ok a little more me...Kim Zolciak and I have a lot in common. I don't have children or a reality show but our style: tawdry, tight, sparkly, and sometimes offensive. I don't wear a wig or reflect her style when it comes to designer name tags but if I could afford a wig instead of my long Blond 40 hour a week upkeep head of hair (thanks Groupon salon packages and Nioxin haircare without you my bleach blond hair wouldn't look so bad ass) I would have Styrofoam dolls heads drying in the sun on my balcony no matte what the neighbors thought.
I smoke which isn't cool or classy which is why I like to coin myself and style: Trashy Chic. I have a loud, bad mouth, and I say it like it is (too much sometimes). I have not had my first botox treatment yet but sadly I am excited and doing it on my next birthday. By the way I am going to quit, and even though Kim says she quit, I am not going to claim this is the truth because I don't live with the bitch so I wouldnt know.
Why I love Kim? 
She doesn't care what other people think in a way that breathes, "If you want to set yourself against me I don't give a fuck about you or what you say." That doesn't mean she isn't nice it just means that if your not nice she doesn't let you forget it. Also, she is not afraid to act like a hot mess and always cleans up shinier and better. She is hot and knows it for real. How many women out there can honestly and publicly claim to love the way they look? Many people might assume that she didn't put any hard work into her looks because she says working out is not in her usual schedule of events. It takes a lot of time, effort, trial and horrible error to pull of a good fake look. I for one am not a natural beauty and am lucky to have the option to look my kind of good with the use of fake electronic and disposable products to pull this shit off. Either way, being able to to pull this off on a budget is another job itself and coupon crazy ladies don't know how to get a Christian Dior suit size 2 black and new for $40 bucks like I do (patting my back). Anyway Kim is going to wear what she wants and what looks good.
What makes Kim so hot?
Her new show, "Don't be tardy for the wedding," is fucking hilarious. She is becoming more repeatable to those of us who only wear 5inch heels at appropriate times and wear the plaid button down trend with a shirt underneath by having a more family approach: unconventional or not. Her husband is amazing on TV at least and I actually liked him more for some reason when Kim had to correct him on her show about only having one liver instead of two. Most important: Kim is a woman who wanted to be famous: check have nice things and look hot: check. meet a good man and have more children: check check. So rather you think she is the devil in carnent or your role model you can't disagree with the fact that she worked and achieved some of her life goals at the age of 34. Not many people have even checked off one dream or life goal in their 50's.
Q: Why are Kim Zolziak and Suzy Orman household names? A: Because they did what they wanted to do and not what anyone advised, suggested or what society suggested they do.
Suzy Orman reflects my inner style which doesn't make the impression but just like my choice in clothing I do what feels good and natural. I am obsessed with all things: personal finance. This includes Suzy Orman and her show, along with the books she has written over the years. She is not my only or sole source of obtaining and stimulating my obsession with money and the drive to accumulate more of it, while putting it in the correct life slot. Some people don't like Oprah and while I am not a hater or one of those ladies who find orgasm screaming over a new cake batter mixer I can understand why this relationship deters and drives people towards the Suzy Orman brand. Of course you can't blame anyone on the planet for taking Oprah up on almost any opportunity let alone instant fame and money. I sure as hell wouldn't. Oprah if your listening my answer is, "yes, yes, can I use your pen?" On the other side of the Oprah peninsula people starting to really become annoyed with Dr. Phil (sorry I am a fan by guilty pleasure) and so there became this cheesy feeling attached to the Oprah rat pack. Dr. Oz is somewhat cheesy, and we all try to ignore and secretly want more of the Nate Berkus mistake/meltdown/show running after being canceled for a long time..mess.
Anyway, Suzy is the real deal and didn't accumulate wealth early in life. She didn't get a break until much later in life. She was still a waitress in her mid thirties-look it up. She also balances her Oprah, "I kinda sort of ..owe you for life stamp," by not budging on her style. The institution of her core foundation communicates with her truth. Is she the only source you need for your financial future? No, and she agrees.
Suzy Orman made tips as a waitress in her thirties and worked her ass off to make it to her first New York Times best sellers list.
What makes Suzy Orman such a bad ass?
She is not a phony. She doesn't compromise her personality traits even if it means the possible determent of a viewer. Suzy Orman is not going to be nice in order for you to like her. Also, she is a know it all without trying to make an agenda proving to her audience she is. In other words, she gives information towards her audience in a natural way that happens to carry a great balance. She makes moron's not feel moronic, she makes the narcissitic assholes feel smarter instead of jelous, she makes the everyday average person feel there is no agenda in her information and most important: She is sprinkled with a hint of crazy like myself but her sprinkle of this mechanism only causes her to repeat her outfits. Why does Suzy repeat her outfits? For the same reason I wear 6'inch heels: "Because she fucking wants to."
What Is there no one like Suzy?
Because she doesn't have a repetitive similar rant structured in a diverse way for her audience. Some argue her books are similar with one or a couple having information to make it above the rest. That's different in terms of needed structural guidance. Her books are inventive and because her information and gig is: finances she needs to update it and does wonderfully. Her show is genius because she makes a topic that could be easily beaten to death and skewed on an overall ending unanswered vertigo into a slow build of knowledge to make better choices for yourself.
What do Suzy and Kim have in common?
They both have their own show. They are both net a million as of May 2012. They both went from one time waitress status to rich status. They both have great fake tan's, blond hair and best of all: they don't give a fuck what others think but care enough to have a heart. The number one reason I love these two women remains that: they aren't going to put up with any shit and their goals holding moral judgments are still being worked on molded and achieved.
A few weeks ago I was submitting my Suzy Orman life class test answers online for her sweepstakes while watching, "Don't be tardy for the wedding," on Bravo. I can't blame people for seeing me and instantly not assuming I have been putting money in my IRAs since the age of 20 or that I invest in stock, or that I am a honor's student getting my masters degree. I know looking like hot mess barbie on steroids isn't the best representation of my feminist beliefs (everyone looks at me like I am crazy at the Planned Parenthood events wearing my 6inch heels). Nevertheless, I can't help being who I am and my motives aren't to impress anyone. If I could afforded the blond wig's I would wear them alone just like I am wearing Mac's bombshell pink lipstick right now and have nowhere to go.
