I'm
not too sure about John, but I sure as hell would have died if this bore-fest
would have continued any longer. I'm told John
Dies At The End has a cult following. I'm told it is based on a book or a
comic. Could I care? NO! That's how torturous and brutally boring the film
was, expect maybe for the last five minutes, but by then I couldn't give a
damn.
What's wrong with the film, you ask? Well, pretty much everything and the fact that it tries to be something that it is not. It tries to be nerdy, but is a halfhearted attempt at that. It tries to be funny, but HA HA! the joke’s on you, because it is NOT funny. It tries to be Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, but once again, guess what, it's not. As for the big revelation at the end, which I shall not divulge, except for the fact that it's not really that original anymore since it's been done to death for a while now.
What's the story you ask? It's something about a black drug called "soy sauce" that infects the person taking it and making him/her see the future and travel across dimensions and eventually blow up. Obviously our two heroes John and Dave, played by Rob Mayes and Chase Williamson, are somehow immune to that, and I pretty much blame the time I wasted watching this film on that very fact. Paul Giamatti is probably the only good thing in the film aside from his acting and role being almost like everything that he has done till now, so maybe that's not great either.
I would highly recommend that you read the film's poster before you make your decision to watch it, rather the tagline in the poster which reads "Just so you know... They're sorry for everything that's about to happen". I should have seen that in time because I can't even blame the makers now. They bloody well warned us right there on the poster. Who feels like a doofus now? That would be me.
Obviously the above thoughts I have about the film are my personal opinions because then again if you find a door knob changing into a penis funny, the film might just be right up your alley.
Rating : 1.5 / 5
