A negative attitude is somewhat contagious and if you spend time with someone who is constantly negative then you too will start to feel this way. It feels as if those we spend time with affect how we feel. But that’s not true really. You have full control over how you feel.
I had a friend who had a negative attitude, she was negative towards every aspect of her life. I started to dread her coming to visit, which sadly she did quite regularly. Nothing in her life was right and the whole world was against her.
I used to find myself down and depressed before she even arrived as I knew the day would be filled with a negative mood. She never had anything nice to say about anyone or anything. She was actually controlling my feelings as I would find myself in a negative mood too.
It was my husband who first noticed and used to tell me to stop her coming as when she did I would be in a bad mood for the rest of the day. I had not personally noticed it.
In the end it became so much of an issue that I had to speak out and tell her how her negative attitude was affecting my own life.
We remained friends and she remained negative yet I learned not to allow her negative attitude to affect me. I choose to challenge her negative thoughts and turn it around on her. She of course didn’t like this. In the end she actually saw where I was coming from, thankfully.
“If it bothers you that much “ I asked her “ The why don’t you do something about it?”
She looked at me as if I had two heads, she had never actually even bothered to think about this herself.
She was one of those people who would sit and moan the day away and surround herself with negative situations. She made the wrong choice in men to only end up in miserable relationships and eating the wrong kind of foods when she was trying to loose weight.
Her negative attitude was ugly. Was it any wonder she didn’t have many friends? She never had anything nice to say.
I don’t think she even knew how negative she was.
“Anything nice happened? ” I asked her one day “Have you not noticed when you come for coffee all we have to talk about is bad stuff?”
“Oh do we, I hadn’t noticed” she replied
Our friendship soon started to dwindle when I became ill with my own depression. I was far too busy challenging negative thoughts of my own to worry about hers. Her everyday moans were a far cry away from my own dark mood.
I heard she had met a new man and moved away. I saw a status on her daughters Facebook a few nights ago, she was talking to one of her friends and her friend had asked her why the sad face.
“Oh just my mom moaning on again” she replied, I had to laugh.
I guess this negative attitude is still the focus of her life, whereas thankfully I prefer to be a positive thinker.