Humor Magazine

I’m Ugly And Have No Talent – Can I Be A Film Star Oily George?

By Gingerfightback @Gingerfightback

I’m Ugly And Have No Talent – Can I Be A Film Star Oily George?
Oily,

The drama teacher says my acting career will never amount to more than a hill o’ beans. Despite not knowing what that means, I’m assuming it ain’t positive as she always gets the class to laugh at me whilst I’m taking my turn on stage.

I have done all the classes and got top marks like, but my protruding tooth, flaming ginger hair and the mole sitting on the end of my nose are a hindrance. Any tips?

Bob, Over There

Oily Replies

Hi Bob,

A sad story, but there is inspiration out there. My fellow Oscar winning actor Ron Jeremy is no oil painting as you seen from his role in genteel Sunday night period dramas, Go Down on Abbey and Rockford’s Piles.

With his pot belly, webbed toes and dubious taste in sandals, Ron is no Ryan Gosling, yet pneumatic, breathy, stiletto wearing, badly dubbed girls the world over have loved him dearly. Frequently. All at once. Sometimes involving implements to!

So there is hope

Oily


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