Well hello, Mod31 readers! If there’s any of you who still checks this page after my prolonged absence. The past couple of months have been an emotional roller coaster for me, and I felt the need to take a step back from an active ministry and recollect myself prayerfully.
One thing that turned my life askew was getting laid off from my job – the main source of income I had. As with anyone else, I like to maintain a certain amount of control on life and had to battle feelings of helplessness and disappointment, as there wasn’t anything I could do at the moment to change my current state. It’s in these moments when I learn over and over again what St. Paul meant when he rejoices in weakness (1Cor 12). In order to have hope, we need to acknowledge that we are weak and ever so dependent on the Lord to take care of us. Because in the end, everything we receive is through God’s grace anyway, and our lives belong to Him. It’s not about how much we can accomplish on this earth, but how much we can glorify Him in what we do. Being able to let go like that takes a lot of humility – a virtue that I struggle with every day. You can imagine the humility boot camp God presented me with over the holidays as I faced family and friends and their questions about the happenings in my life.
So I hashed it out with Jesus. On my end, angry words were said and tears were shed. All the while he continues to pour out His unending love from the Blessed Sacrament. Even before the lay off, my life was in a whirlwind and for a while I hadn’t had a clear vision of what the Lord was asking of me. Once I had peace in my heart, I could better listen to Him about what He wants me to do (and be). My life is truly blessed with wonderful and insightful friends who have helped me along the way to not lose perspective and gain strength in prayer. Sometimes we just need to do nothing in order to hear God in the little whisper of the wind.
Now I’ve been offered a new job and look forward to posting more on here about style and exploring what it means to be an authentic woman.Learning about femininity, modesty, and chastity has played an essential role in my healing process, and I enjoy writing (and processing) things I’ve learned on my journey. When I think of where I was even just a year and a half ago, I barely recognize myself. I’ve also been able to view the world through new eyes, and it breaks my heart when I hear fellow ladies struggle with accepting the bright and beautiful beings that they are. I pray that this will, in some small way, bring Christ’s redeeming love into battles against the darkness that fills so many hearts.
Anywho, thanks to the few of you who still check this page every now and then!
