Dating Magazine

Finding Your Bliss, Are You Living Or Are You Existing?

By Shauntee @shaunteebattie

Finding Your Bliss, Are You Living or Are You Existing?“Don’t worry about failure. Worry about the chances you miss when you don’t even try” author unknown

A few years ago, I watched a movie and the question was asked to one of the characters “are you living or are you existing?’ Over the past month, I’ve had a few people say to me “we all can’t be as perfect as you are” and “we all can’t have the perfect life you have” which kind of pissed me off because I do not have the perfect life, I have problems just as everyone else does but I refuse to let problems keep me from enjoying my life. I have come to the conclusion that some people get stuck in a rut, they have a string of events that trigger them to simply check out on life. Relationships sour, finances fizzle, love ones die, and people just forget how to live and move on past these occurrences.  Life for them becomes a routine of the same events daily work, eat, sleep, and  if they date it becomes a scheduled organized event. As a result, they become conditioned to doing things a certain way and it becomes hard for them to change. In reality, I believe that most people want to enjoy their life but don’t know how and no matter how hard they try they can’t find their bliss. So here are some techniques that give me the so called “perfect” life I have:

Find the Good in the Bad

Bad things happen, plain and simple. We cannot control what happens with the people in our lives nor can we control the circumstances in our lives. You have to remember that everything happens for a reason. It teaches us a lesson, it builds our character, and it gives us strength. Sometimes things happen that we can’t explain or figure out but you have to know that whatever the reason is it was designed to make you stronger. Some people take crying as a sign of weakness, crying it not a sign of weakness it a sign that you’re alive. We’re brought into this world crying! Take the time you need to deal with grief, anger, and disappointment and then get your ass up and appreciate and live your life. I’ve dealt with the four D’s Death, destitution, divorce, and disappointment and in the end I had to do what was best for me and let it go!

Surround Yourself with People Who Enjoy Their Life

It’s nothing worse than people who don’t like to do shit! Seriously, there are people who don’t like to do anything. They don’t like people, they don’t like going out, they don’t like this, and they don’t like that. No wonder you’re stuck in a rut! I’ve had to ask people “well what the hell is it you do” Let these people go! Surround yourself with people who enjoy life and get out you will soon find that happiness is contagious just as misery is. Seize every opportunity, travel, and do what makes you happy. Release people that are miserable all the time who don’t like to do stuff! I understand that sometimes finances get in the way but there are plenty of things you can do that are inexpensive. Now if you’re doing OK financially and still don’t reward yourself by enjoying life and traveling then you are really not living. Those who want to do will find a way, those who don’t will find an excuse!

Chill Out

I take 3 things serious in life, my health, my finances, and my family. Everything else is whatever! I don’t panic over stupid stuff, I won’t get upset if a dish is left in the sink, I don’t panic if I’m running late for a reservation, and I don’t panic when things happen that can be easily fixed. Let lose! Dance around your house, slide down the banister, do cartwheels, and laugh at embarrassing moments! I thought I was a teenager a few years ago and did the soulja boy dance and hopped the wrong way causing me to trip and fall. I laughed so hard until I didn’t realize the excruciating pain in my right ankle. I ended up walking on my great grandmother’s cane for 3 days and laughed at myself everyday!

Remember Karma – It will bite you in the ass

For everything you do there’s an equal or opposite reaction. If you do something nice for someone, they will either do something nice in return or simply dismiss your action all together. I make it a habit to treat people as I want to be treated. When you run into people who are mean or cruel remember one important thing, they’re miserable! Don’t take it personally, keep doing you! Whatever you do in life whether good or bad will come back to you, if you do something wrong to someone it will came back on you 10-fold and the same will happen if you do good. Don’t hold grudges, don’t wish misery on people, and don’t speak bad things into people life. Your thoughts become reality, so be careful! If someone does something to you, let them know how you feel, if you wish to eliminate them do so but wish them well.

Change doesn’t happen unless you allow it; you have to make a firm commitment to yourself that you will enjoy this stage play called life. Sometimes people are placed in your life unexpectedly to show you how to live, it’s up to you to accept these people into your life and embrace positive changes. I don’t care how many times my heart gets broken, how many mistakes I may make, or how many times I may fail. I will always take comfort in knowing that at least I had the guts to try, I’m no coward! One of my biggest fears is growing old and regretting things that I didn’t get a chance to do or in some cases say. So the next time you look in the mirror ask yourself am I living or am I merely just existing? Now go live your life!


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