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Today signals the final week of Kindergarten phasing-in. Praise the vodka gods and No FFS!? To say I'm relieved the phasing in period is over is as much of an understatement as saying Lindsay Lohan doesn't mind the odd drink.
Last week it was a head lice outbreak on day 1, this week some moron didn't read the welcome letter and phase in details correctly. FFS!?
Well, I did read it, but I stopped at the bit where it said the Twin Tornado were being phased in on the afternoons of their designated Kindy days. Right below that was a second, bold, very clearly worded and idiot-proof line that said the second week of phase in would swap to mornings. I didn't read that line. FFS!? I showed up at school on Tuesday afternoon, Twin Tornado bursting to see their friends, me anxious to run all the errands I'd saved up for the 2.5 child-free hours. Silence. Not a child in sight.
I stood there, backpacks in hand, uniformed-up Twin Tornado in tow, and hoped like mad that the teacher would take pity on me and just take them for the afternoon instead.
After 90 seconds it was getting kind of awkward, and clearly it wasn't going to happen. FFS!? So the whiney, hot (it was 40 degrees - just over 100 for you Farenheiter's) and now completely shitty, inconsolable and untrusting Twin Tornado were dragged back to the car. FFS!? I was pretty much the same - whiney, hot, completely shitty and inconsolable, and equally as dubious as they were about my absolutely shit house parenting skills. FFS!? I dragged our three, hot, whiney and disappointed selves around through all the errands. Needless to say, it took twice as long with all of us in such foul moods. FFS!?
Wednesday, a friend who has a girl in the Twin Tornado's kindy class, and an older daughter in the class next to Miss7 texted me, reminding me to take Miss7 to school that day. Thursday, I got it right. Go me!
It was only then that I found out I hadn't missed 2.5hrs of child-free peace and quiet on Tuesday....I'd actually missed THREE POINT FIVE HOURS. FFS!? I was beside myself at the 2.5hrs. I was absolutely devastated when I found out the classes go longer this week and I'd actually missed an additional hour. FFS!?
Of course I'm convinced that all the other kids learnt long division in those 3.5hrs, and the Twin Tornado are destined to lag behind academically as a result. FFS!?
