FFS!? Friday : The New FFS

I can't even deal. No time for witty banter. I have found white. Multiple whites. They are ganging up on the brown/red/hybrid of other colours and they are rapidly advancing. First it was a random eyebrow hair a couple once or twice a year. Then it was....get this....an arm hair.  WTF? Now, they've reached the summit and they are gaining strength as they re-group up there. They are glinting at me, mocking me, every time I look in the bathroom mirror. I've stopped counting.... It's just too depressing. I've stopped pulling them out.... They just grow back and stick up because they are short and the rest of my hair is long and so, of course the non-conforming exhibitionist bastards stand out.  Or up.  Whatever. Am going to have to start making some really hard decisions... Like how much of my wine budget do I now have to allocate to frequent hair dying? How long until Depends eat away at that budget too? And how much for a mobility scooter? I am 35 - far too young for FFS!? to mean something entirely different and not remotely age-appropriate.