FFS Friday!? The "look at Me I'm Hosting!" Edition, Featuring Bali, Bikes and Birthdays

So the ever awesome creator of FFS!? Friday, DearBabyG is off in Bali.  FFS!? On a family trip, and not a girls' trip with me.  FFS!? Prior to her departure, we swapped various emails detailing the conditions required for me to drop everything and run to her assistance.  I firmly believe she will come through with the goods, and create the necessary situation for me to join her. Hippy Brad, MrDearBabyG to those not in the know, spent the week prior to their holiday tweeting me his countdown, as if I was totally excited for him heading to cocktail central while I stayed home, FFS!? While DearBabyG has been silent on the Social Media front, obviously making the most of the Mojito's, Hippy Brad has tweeted to advise he is in a bar, and he has been shopping and declined to purchase.  SACRILEGE.  FFS!? So while DearBabyG is off sunning, swimming, hopefully not sexing Hippy Brad as a show of solidarity for me, and socking back cocktails, I have taken on the hosting duties of FFS!? Friday.
What has given me the shits this week, besides not being in Bali?
The kids and their Christmas giftage. They all wanted bikes, partly down to my passive suggestions and coaxing, since I had put bikes on layby way back in July.  For months all I heard was this...
Miss 6 :  "Mum...when's Santa bringing my bike?  Will it have Barbie on it?  Because I want it to have streamers too, and a bell." Mstr3 : "Mummy...[insert girly man whine]...my bike, nooooo!  Cars, Mummy...Cars bike! Noooo!"  Miss3 : "I say pleaseeeee....GIVE ME MY BIKE!"
Every freaking time we passed a faux Santa doing time photo op's in shopping centres, they would squeal about the bikes they wanted. Imagine my parental smugness as I casually threw open the front door Christmas morning to reveal their bikes. They did indeed run out squealing. Immediately afterwards, Miss6 continued squealing because she'd fallen off hers 48 times in the first 10 minutes, FFS!? Immediately afterwards, Mstr3 was found inside, ignoring his bike, getting around like this :

Lance Armstrong he is not.  This is as close to bike riding as Mstr3 got

Immediately afterwards, Miss3 was found inside, smacking her brother on the head and laughing hysterically.  Followed shortly after by this :

Rocking the Ewok look in a towel poncho.  Take note, Rachel Zoe - you're welcome.

Miss3 has taken up residence, sitting on the crap old busted toddler trike that she refused to ride ever since she was old enough to say NO!  Completely ignoring her new bike.
When Miss6 had sufficiently covered herself in bandaids to stem the non-existent flow of blood, she returned to riding :

In disguise.  Or Drag.  I'm unsure which look she was going for.

Please note the toddler boy's Cars2 bike she is riding.  Not her much whined after Barbie bike with the bell.  Instead, her brother's bike that sends him into a screeching frenzy if he gets within a 2 foot radius of it.  Or if his sister rides it.  Or if anyone looks at it.
Entire Christmas giftage FFS!? After this total Christmas fail I gave up.  I got slack.  I couldn't give a crap.
Which is why I completely forgot to bake/buy the twin tornado birthday cakes for their 3rd birthday last Friday.  So instead, this is what they got :

A bit hard to see, but please note their expressions of utter joy and delight as I present them with fairy bread, cut into star shapes, with three candles in the top.  Happy freaking birthday you bike dissing little darlings.

It's been an entire festive period of FFS!? moments for me.  How about you?  Feel free to spew forth blog your own FFS!? moments this week and link up below.