Tommy Tapper, “Plumber To The Stars” provides a valuable introduction to DIY.
If it can be fixed he won’t be able to do it
His manual, “I Bodge Therefore I am,” is an acknowledged masterclass in the no-nonsense, no worries, no skill approach to DIY.
Here are some of his trade secrets for Boilers.
1. What is the primary purpose of a boiler? To breakdown.
2. Where are boilers located? In a very inaccessible spot in your home.
3. What are they made of? Normally stiff metally stuff. A few pipes pop out. These allow you to play a boiler as a wind instrument in a mildly comedic fashion.
4. Normal boiler problems? They stop working.
5. Things to consider before you fix a boiler;
i) If you can’t fix it by hitting it with your hammer, you maybe facing a more sizeable problem.
ii) The journey time to your local Accident and Emergency unit.
iii) Use a naked flame to check for a gas leak. Much the quickest way and so much better than all this politically correct, health and safety, Muslims eat our babies do gooding stuffed constantly rammed down our throats by the EU.
iv) Your adjustable spanner is comfortable with change.
v) That it is the boiler you are fixing.
5. Little known fact about the Boiler
The domestic boiler was invented in 1874 by Derek Central-Heating. Fancy that!
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