Dating Magazine

Developing Confidence in Approaching Relationships

By Tobehitch

Confidence is extremely important in any relationship. There is a profound difference between ARROGANCE and CONFIDENCE. Arrogance = douchebag status, where guys or girls think they are hot shiz but really are just annoying and socially awkward. Unless they are hot. In which case, society and I are willing to overlook a lot of major obvious flaws for the sake of their HOTNESS. Man, what I would do to bite into one of those hot, sexy, sumptuous…hairy man nipples. CHYEA. Nothing beats a nice stash of manly chest hair. VOMIT.

Women and men can both sniff confidence from a mile away. It’s a known fact that 60 – 80% of communication is done on a subconscious level. That means a MAJORITY of what you say is done NOT through anything you say, but how you walk, act and carry yourself. That’s why it’s so important to carry yourself with confidence. Don’t forget, initial contact (especially for guys) is super important. It’s hard to FABRICATE confidence and fake it, but here are some things you can do to give yourself a tangible confidence boost:

1.) Lose some weight. I’m not going to lie. I gained a ton of weight these past six months. I KNEW that I was gaining weight, and I tried to stop it. Every morning I would tell myself, “starting TODAY I’m going to diet and exercise…” Then, as I drove into the McDonald’s Drive Thru, I would say “Starting TOMORROW I will diet and exercise…” MAKE TOMORROW TODAY! I promise the McDonalds Diet doesn’t work! I’ve TRIED IT!

For me, because I have been developing major man boobs as of late, I’ve started to work out and diet again. Look, you don’t have to be STICK SKINNY to feel good about yourself. As a matter of fact, too skinny is usually a bad thing. However, you and I both know that generally speaking those who are fit are more attractive. I feel so much better about myself already after a couple weeks of dieting and working out. Being in shape will give you a DEFINITE confidence boost, and will also make you more attractive. I want to say here that it’s not ONLY about being skinny. It’s about the fact that if you’re skinny, you’re communicating to other people that you have enough discipline and work ethic to stay in shape.

2.) Dress better. Learning how to dress, and how to stay clean shaven will increase your attractiveness and confidence significantly. Clothes can transform a person – that’s why when people dress in suits, they are so impressive. There’s something psychologically alluring about someone who knows how to dress well. Remember, 60 – 80% of your communication is subconscious, and how you dress and take care of yourself is a huge part of that! Buy new clothes…if you’re not sure what to get, find a friend who’s SUPER fashionable, and take them shopping with you. If you’re a girl, ask a guy to go with you to buy clothes (preferably gay, and definitely not a guy who only likes hoochie mamas); if you’re a guy ask a fashionable girl to go with you to buy clothes (preferably a girl that you’re attracted to so that you can get some quality one on one time as well…STRATEGY IS KEY).

3.) Increase your status somehow. One of the best ways to be more confident is to just increase your status somehow. Take up some hobbies to get good at stuff like sports, musical instruments, etc. We’re all attracted to people who are talented. I can’t tell you how many times I see a girl jamming out on the piano, or singing a beautiful song and my mouth just drops open and I fall instantly in love. Hate to break it to all you men out there, but being super good at video games is NOT going to win any girls over. She’s not going to be impressed that you can perform 140 Actions Per Minute with your mouse. Girls, on the other hand…if you’re good at video games. DAMN. THAT’S HOT.

Furthermore, either becoming a leader within your local network or getting lots of money through working hard is a MAJOR attractive boost for guys. This isn’t JUST about girls being gold diggers. It’s because women want security and comfort. Shoot, we ALL do. Guys who are in a position to provide their women with security and comfort are more likely to succeed in the world of dating. There’s NO WAY that Beyonce dates Jay-Z if Jay-Z wasn’t who he is – one of the leading men in the rap industry. Let’s be honest here…Beyonce is freaking SMOKING HOT, and Jay-Z? This picture speaks for itself.

Conclusion: Look, I know that a lot of people feel like EVEN if they did all of these things, it wouldn’t help, so why go through all the trouble of doing it? But thinking like that is the VERY REASON why you don’t have any confidence. FEELING BETTER about yourself begins with a conscious decision to improve yourself as a person. Everyone starts somewhere! You can’t just wake up tomorrow and suddenly be more confident. You have to build that confidence every single day by making good choices.

Don’t be so SHORT-SIGHTED. Of course changing your clothes isn’t going to “suddenly” get you your dream girl/dream guy. Of course it’s a freaking pain in the ass to exercise, and if you’re anything like me, you have a PROFOUND HATE FOR TONY HORTON NOW. However, you can’t ever GET TO WHERE YOU WANT TO BE unless you start somewhere. Becoming the man or woman that you want to be, the confident and attractive type, takes a bit of hard work. If all else fails, just go with the arranged marriage. “She might be a little big now…but you’ll grow into her!” – Russell Peters

Back to Featured Articles on Logo Paperblog