I’m pretty sure I killed a cactus.
I was really, really careful. I only watered it once a month, like the lady who sold it to me said to do. And then someone commented that parts of the plant were looking wrinkled, and I looked it up on the internet (don’t.) and read that the wrinkled skin of a cactus meant it hadn’t been watered enough so then I watered it more and now it keeps getting worse so I think it’s dead.
I have never been able to keep a plant alive. I also killed a fish last year, because I picked a tropical fish and kept the AC on the whole time and I also probably overfed it.
I am not to be trusted with living things. I do okay taking care of my roommate’s dog when she’s gone, but she’s never been gone overnight. I am actually terrified of taking care of that precious dog for more than a few hours. I just am not good at taking care of things.
I can barely take care of myself.
It sometimes can be weird to be 26 and unable to keep a plant alive, but I suppose that might just be the kind of person I am. I’ve never really wanted kids, and while there are a lot of reasons behind that, one of the major ones is that I’d be worried I wouldn’t be able to take care of them and me. Especially if I can’t even keep a plant alive.
It’s also weird to tell people you don’t want kids. I mean, I have a uterus, so I’m pre-disposed to wanting children, right?
No, actually. And it’s not as if I haven’t thought about maybe adopting older kids one day in the future, but until I’m sure I can take care of myself, I’m not going to commit to raising someone else.
I guess I tell you all of this to say, be who you are. If you love plants and animals and want 10 babies, do that. If you can’t keep plants alive and don’t think you’ll ever want children, awesome. If you can’t keep plants alive but still want children, great. Just, you know,…careful.
It’s hard to be who you are. I know how hard it can be. But I honestly believe that the more honest you are with yourself and others, the better you are as a person.
And if you spend your whole life doing something you love and making a difference in this world instead of having children or along with having children or the difference you make in this world is the children that you raise, then great. I think you’re amazing, no matter what.
I just hope you’re able to take the time to really figure out what you want. It’s the most important thing.
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