It's funny really, some people are so pro breastfeeding, that is until you do it in public then suddenly it's offensive? Figure that one out...or you're judged if you do it after the age of 1, "shouldn't you stop now..."
Then those same people see a mother feeding her newborn baby with a bottle and assume its formula..maybe mom expressed, or maybe she did decide to use formula, but its unfair to judge. It could even be that she tried to breastfeed, she might have had problems, milk didn't come in fast enough, poor production etc..
I have 2 lovely ladies here to tell their stories of their journey with formula feeding..enjoy :)
Roxee & BellaAfter 4 years of feeling something wasn't normal with my breasts, I finally plucked up the courage to visit the doctor at the age of 18, which was when I discovered I have no breast tissue in one breast and malformed breast tissue in the other. Although I had it fixed visually, it was not until I fell pregnant a year later at 19, that it became apparent I wasn't producing milk, which I can only assume is linked with the lack of breast tissue; Insufficient glandular tissue (IGT)
This left me with only one option. To formula feed Bella. I was quite happy to do so however I do feel I have missed out on a special bonding experience and an important experience of motherhood. Formula feeding took a little while to adapt to, although she took to it straight away, she was certainly a hungry baby (now a hungry toddler!) so we switched to a hungry baby formula, which left her very constipated and unable to pass stools.
So to ease the constipation I heard ready made milk can help. From then on we kept little cartons of SMA in the cupboard for such occasions and believe me they worked a treat!
After reaching a milk routine that worked best for her, formula was a great alternative to breast feeding until she was old enough to have cows milk.
Thank you for reading my story.
Sarah & Abby
I found out I was pregnant at 3 weeks! Yep, 3 weeks!! Shortly after that I was told I had hyperemesis but the baby was going fine. I just had to try and eat as much as possible. Turned out eating was impossible. I threw up everything and anything and kept loosing weight. At every check up the midwives assured me that the baby was always fine. Each sonogram showed the right amount of growth and the right amount of amniotic fluid, so no one was alarmed. On my birthday I had a sonogram appointment to see if we could tell the sex of the baby. We were having a baby girl!!! That was the greatest birthday gift I had ever received. Around that same time is when I had the talk with my midwife. Was I going to breastfeed or formula? I answered with “I don’t know, I need to do some research first”. They looked at me like I had ten heads and started throwing breastfeeding pamphlets at me. I wasn’t given a single one about formula or its benefits, just breastfeeding. The following visit I had a decision set in my mind but I knew I was about to face a lot of opposition. I was now very well versed on all the benefits for breastfeeding so I was very interested to see how the midwives were going to try to lure me away from ‘the dark side’ aka formula. I was led into the exam room and then I said the words they didn’t want to hear “Well, I’m choosing formula for the baby” and they instantly started snapping at me. “How will you bond?”, “What about skin to skin?”, “What about the nutrients?”, “What about the cost?”. “How you going to loose all that weight?” etc. I chose formula for several reasons but they all came down to it would be best for the baby. I have anxiety at random times, hypersensitivity at random times; what would happen if I’m having issues with something that I can not overcome and it would be time to feed the baby? They tried to say I could pump so there was always a back up supply, but what if I react to the machine and can’t provide? Formula can be made up by anyone at anytime regardless of anything happening to me. I also tried to point out that I have a very weak immune system from having mono in the past, that I am anemic and with constant hyperemisis. I was a recipe for disaster, not nutrients for a newborn. Another issue I saw that they did not was I take prescription migraine medicine and unless I stopped taking them I cannot breastfeed. If I stopped taking them Matt would have to stay home a lot (without meds I get them 4+ times a week) and our income would dwindle down to nothing. My final issue I had was with them pushing weight loss. If you want women to breastfeed because its good for the baby, that’s fine but do not try to highlight it as the hot new fitness trend sweeping the nation. I had already lost 30lbs; I was already under my pre-pregnancy weight. After listening to all of this they stopped pushing and the great debate finally stopped...for now. On the lovely very early morning hours of August 29thI began to feel funny. I called Matt and he left his job and came to get me in one of these big work trucks. We were so nervous. I went to get checked out but it was our 3rd false alarm and we were sent home from the hospital. Matt’s dad came to pick us up but during that car ride home I began to feel sharp pains in my uterus. By the time I got home full blow labor had begun. Feeling very defeated from our 3rd false alarm I had sent Matt to his job to pick up the car because I didn’t think it was happening yet, but boy was I wrong!! We rush back and they confirm I’m in labor (really? Because screaming every 90 seconds wasn’t enough of a hint?) and I receive my epidural. Ahh relief!! 23 hours later I start feeling funny again and turned out it was time to push!! Well, I decided it was time to have a full-blown panic attack. I didn’t understand why people were telling me to “shhhh”. I remember telling people “you shhhh!!! Don’t shhh me!” and screaming but that’s about it. 59min later the baby had made her grand arrival. Abigail Grace was born and was staring right into my eyes. She was so perfect she was barely even crying. 6:29am on August 30th at a perfect 8lbs 2oz with a very full head of black hair! My hyperemesis had not affected her at all. I was so relieved! I truly thought after the talk with my midwives, I would be done with the great breastfeeding debate, but little did I know that throughout the next 11.5 months I’d talk to a lot of people because of Abigail. It started in the hospital hours after having her! We had rude nurses barging into our room, giving their comments as if someone asked. My favorite was “don’t give up! You must breastfeed her! It’s important…bond! Bond with your baby!”. I made sure that nurse never came back. Then we’d be out and it’d usually start because of her looks and then just about everyone has asked me if I breastfed. Complete strangers, in the middle of me telling them what her name is, feel the need to ask if she was breastfed or not. Why is that their business? And when I tell them she wasn’t, it’s that same look the midwives gave me all over again. Usually they begin to end the conversation before I get to tell them that even on formula Abigail has always been extremely advanced for her age; so much so that at every doctors appointment she is reading off the charts. She has constantly been in 75-90 percent tile for height & weight and is always 3 months ahead with her motor skills. But nope, I’m the weird one for not breastfeeding. Abigail and I have completely made up for the “bonding time” we “lost” because I chose not to breastfeed her. Every morning we wake up and we cuddle while she has her bottle. We call it “hazing a nom”. Well after we haz nom we play around will all her toys and her fort (a cardboard box Matt & I cut windows and doors in to). Then we go lay down in my bed for a nap together, so its more cuddle time. Then more nom and more play time. So, like I told the midwives even before she was born, we would make up more then enough for the lack of ‘bonding’ from breastfeeding. I truly believe Abigail and I bond just as much as other mommy’s and their babies do that breast feed. It’s all about the parent and how they choose to spend the time with their baby. I don’t think one way is better then the other. I think everyone should have the right to choose and no one should be judged either way. Your body, your baby, your choices! Yay for breast milk! Yay for formula! Most importantly, YAY FOR BABIES!!!!
