Dating Magazine

Be Better Not Bitter: How to Effectively Deal with Bitterness

By Shauntee @shaunteebattie
Be Better Not Bitter: How to Effectively Deal with Bitterness

Photo courtesy of uptown

When it comes to dating, experience has been my number one teacher. No one can prepare you for love, heartbreak, or anything in between. You have to get out there and experience the world for yourself. When things don’t work out, you pick yourself up and keep going. There is no instruction manual or assignment to prepare you for matters of heart. You play with the hand you’re dealt and each time things doesn’t work out you get a new set of cards and start all over again, eventually you win!

While in the game, we often deal with bad hands that are dealt to us and we decide to give up. We begin to think there’s no good cards left no aces, no kings, no queens, just a bunch of rotten ass jokers. We throw in the towel, we begin to think people are all the same, and we develop a bitterness that keeps us out the game. You become unapproachable and if you do take on a new hand you’re distant and cold because you’re too busy comparing your new set of cards to the old set. We cannot continuously compare new people in our lives to past relationships that didn’t work out.

I’ve been through the bitter stage before and the best way I found to deal with this was to reverse my thinking. It takes a lot of energy to be mad, bitter, and angry. I found that if I continuously think that everyone is the same and up to no good, then that’s exactly what I’ll attract. Instead of letting the hand you’ve been dealt get you down use it as an opportunity to make yourself better. The more you play the better you get and you’ll finally learn how to get rid of the bad cards early on. You’ll learn how to strategize, you’ll learn how to look for signs of cheating, you’ll learn how to call someone’s bluff, and you’ll learn how to deal with someone reneging .The goal in any situation is to be better, not bitter. You’ll also find that if you simply change your routine, you’ll be amazed at how this impacts your game. You have to learn how to turn every negative thing that happens into a positive.

Never throw in the towel, simply continue working on yourself and when you least expect it, you’ll be dealt a winning hand. You can’t win if you don’t play and it’s best to remember that there are 52 cards in a deck but only 2 of them are jokers.


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