Anyway, I had my first full Boston weekend in a long time this week. I've been doing one-night trips lately, but in summer tradition, I had to dedicate a full 2 days to the lesser of this area's two great cities (just saying). It's also tradition that I write about these weekends, so here it is. Boston weekend round-up:
"I can ride on mi pone."Nasty Pony. A very important part of my trip this weekend, was a little guy named Pone. I'm not saying you HAVE to buy an inflatable unicorn/anteater in order to have fun in Boston; I'm just saying that you should.
Clubs and gay friends. When I think Boston, I think Irish pubs (among other things), but a good thing to do is go to a club with a couple gay guys because this makes you fabulous. You will probably meet mostly unattractive people, but the flashing lights and faux snow/glitter make everyone look better. If you get overwhelmed, you can go on an adventure to the bar next door, but it will probably not be fun. You will also meet a lot of foreigners at a club because, after all, those Euros love clubbing. And this brings me to my next point…
My late-night Chinese boyfriend.Australians. Boston in the summer is crawling with Irishman and Australians, so it's in your best interest to befriend at least one because, if you don't, you may need to wait a whole year for them to come back. Last year, I ate mac and cheese on the curb in front on 7-11 with a couple Irishman. This year, I chose late-night Chinese food with an Australian. All I can tell you about him is that he ordered sesame chicken and he has never seen a kangaroo. Upon learning this, I decided he was not a very good Australian so I finished my dumplings and went home.
Emerald LoungeTacky lounge. Sometimes you find yourself sans entourage, but as long as you have one lady on your side, adventures await. On a night like this, you should just go into somewhere you've never been; choose the first place that catches your eye. Naturally, the first place that caught our eye was the one that was glowing green: Emerald Lounge. This ended up being a brand new Wizard-of-Oz-themed 50s/80s/Pulp-Fiction-esque bar and lounge with a patio that you could only sit on if you ordered an olive plate. The martini glasses were embellished with emeralds and they offered you your check in a light-up book. Unfortunately, we were not able to soak in all the kitsch (as my mom would say) decor because we were verbally accosted by men and had to move on.
Lobster. If you want to be classy, you have to eat lobster twice in one night. Surprisingly, lobster BLTs are delicious and you can get one at 2am for only $7. It's a great way to come full circle on a night that started with a lobster dinner.Tip: On a semi-unrelated note, if your feet hurt in your heels, you can get free Band-Aids from the pharmacist at CVS. I think this goes for any city, but I could be wrong.
