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“I imagine you’d be hard pressed to find a 25 year old portfolio manager”. How could I possibly think this comment was anything but exactly what it seemed – cocky and irritating. I should have trusted my gut.
* * * * * * * * *
George seemed sweet. His sense of humor was clearly on the same sarcastic page as mine, which so far has not been easy to find. From what I could tell, he was also pretty cute. He was 6’5″, broadly built and had soft green eyes. He was definitely easy on my eyes.
We exchanged a few messages and I would say I was 65% interested. He explained that he grew up in Westchester, went to Brown and worked for a hedge fund – how unique for someone on JDate. (Kidding).
We had probably exchanged two or three messages when I read the comment above. He had to be kidding. Hard pressed to find a portfolio manager? I’m far more concerned with finding someone I can laugh with than I am with any job title.
I was with my mom when I got this message and I guess I sighed pretty loudly since she asked me what was wrong. I read the line to her and she agreed that it was arrogant and just generally bazaar. If she agreed, it had to be true. I decide to let this one go and didn’t answer his message.
A few days later when “online” I received an instant message from George. I accepted. We had a conversation that was more than decent. My interest was piqued to 72%.
I couldn’t help myself and had to ask him about that comment. From this exchange, which was totally normal, I hoped maybe the “hard pressed” comment was just a really bad, super dry joke?
“So I’m wondering something…When you wrote in your last message that you imagine I would be hard pressed to find a 25 year old portfolio manager, were you kidding?”
I was (literally) crossing my fingers that he would say yes and apologize if the comment cam off as anything but a joke.
“Um, I guess? To be honest though, I’m pretty proud of my work accomplishments. Why?”
Why?! Because you sound like a total jerk and this is your once chance at redemption and you’re not taking it!
“I guess, to me, it came off as arrogant” I said bluntly.
“Oh, I mean, I guess I could see how it would come off that way?!”
You guess? How about, “Shit, I’m an idiot for not re-reading that before I sent it and realizing what a complete ass I sounded like.
If the conversation we just had, hadn’t been as solid as it was, I certainly would not have said yes when George asked for my email. (I think he felt my hesitation which is why he asked for my email and not my number. He was playing it safe and I respected that.) I gave him my email address and he told me he would be in touch.
And he was. I got a semi-long email the next day which was gentle and kind. Either this kid had two personalities or I had been way too quick to judge. I was choosing to go with the latter.
I decided to be bold and close my email response with giving him my phone number. A few hours later I got a text message from an unknown telephone number – “and now you have mine…”
I didn’t respond right away and was glad, because I got a follow up text the next evening. “So, I’m not sure if you’re trying to play it cool and that’s why you didn’t respond but I hope that’s the case because I would really like to take you out for drinks this week?”
* * * * * * * * *
On Wednesday morning I woke up to a text from George – “How pumped are you?!”
“I don’t mean to come off negative, but I was out of work Monday and Tuesday and just turned on my blackberry, so I’m feeling pretty overwhelmed right about now.” I answered honestly.
“Oh, I’m sorry you’re flooded with emails. But what I meant, actually, was how pumped are you for our date?”
Shit. Wasn’t that tomorrow? Having been out of the past two days, I was almost certain I would have to work late. How could I have made plans for tonight?
“Well, I definitely am. But isn’t that tomorrow?”
“Haha, yes. Didn’t mean to scare you! I was just trying to build up excitement.”
Kind of weird, I couldn’t help but think. But then the next text came in – “at least until the inevitable let down.” I was on the bus when I read this and couldn’t help but laugh out loud. His honesty was refreshing.
* * * * * * * * *
“How does Angel’s Share at 7:30 work for you?” he texted on Thursday around 3 PM.
“That sounds good, I’ll see you then!”
I was looking forward to meeting but doing the best I could to keep my hopes way down. I have been on one too many bad dates to still hope a first date could be close to perfect.
At 7:35 PM I met George outside of a sketchy looking Chinese restaurant when I spotted a giant out of the corner of my eye. That had to be him. We greeted each other with an awkward hug and then he asked about my day while we stood outside in the cold. Why were we not going inside?
Finally, after ten minutes, we headed inside. We walked up the stairs and to the very back of the shady Chinese restaurant to a black door. On the other side was a bar that was straight out of Florence, Italy. The ceilings were hand painted with the most gorgeous murals, there were candles everywhere and the seats were black leather cubes that sat low down. I loved it.
We each had three drinks over the next two hours and really great conversation. We exchanged bad date stories and there was a lot of laughter. A few awkward comments from his end (for example, when he told me something I said was “the most ludicrous thing he had ever heard), but overall it was fine. Until we left the restaurant.
When we got outside, George asked me if I wanted to take a walk. I was 50/50 on whether or not I thought this was anything special, so I agreed. He told me to the lead the way and that he would follow. I decided to make a left out of the restaurant (since I knew that was in the direction of the subway).
“Just so you know, we’re walking in the opposite direction of my apartment,” he said, half under his breath.
“Ok, no problem.”
“Just want to make sure you know my apartment is in the other direction,” he repeated.
Did he think if he worded it differently I was going to stop in my tracks, turn around and run toward his apartment? Come on. I pretended I didn’t hear him say it this second time and just kept walking. We passed a small park witha few benches and tables. He suggested we sit and (for some reason) I agreed.
“Is it raining out?” he asked me at one point.
I stuck my hand out to see if I felt anything and told him I didn’t think it was.
“Oh, I must be imagining things” he said as he stuck his hand out to confirm that nothing was falling from the sky.
The next thing I knew, his hand was practically in front of my face, which I quickly understood was his way of trying to hold my hand. Rule of thumb, when a guy puts his hand that close to your face, it seems more like he is about to slap you than try to hold your hand.
What happened next was, quite simply, a miracle from above. We had seen a rat earlier that night, so my phobia was out in the open. When a huge black rat ran across the bench next to us, it was the perfect (and only) excuse to get up and literally run toward the subway.
George followed and for some reason, he thought it was a good idea to try and hold my hand for a second time. I pretended not to notice and grabbed my bag with both hands.
“Oh, ok. That’s the second time I tried to hold your hand tonight that you shut me down.”
“Really? Oh my god, I can’t believe that” I said with a ditzy laugh.
In my eyes, we could not have gotten to the subway any sooner. It was clear that George didn’t feel the same, since he kept walking without realizing he had passed it. Until, that is, he turned around and noticed that I had stopped a few feet back.
“Sooo, I think I’m going to head home but thank you so much for tonight,” I said as politely as I could.
The hug that followed was undoubtably the most awkward human interaction to have taken place since the beginning of time.
“Ughh” he said as soon as I let go.
“What?” I asked.
“It’s just, I was hoping for a kiss.
That did not just happen. He did not just say that. Any doubt I had about whether this kid could be someone I could start to like was settled.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I don’t kiss on the first date.”
And with that, we went our separate ways.
