A Movie Buff Learns From Movies

Outside school classes, you can learn from any moment or anything. It could be from people cutting your queue in the street, or simply a random talk from a taxi driver on your way home. If you’re spiritual, you learn from spiritual books or experiences. If you’re a movie buff, you learn from movies. And if you love romance, you soak the wild oats from it.

Many people inspired by Jerry Maguire, they make their vows from it. Or copying the iconic kissing scene from Titanic. Perhaps copying that intense kiss during heavy rain in The Notebook.People were moved enough to copy it.

Some romance movies were moving enough to make me learn some things quite personal. Now, since it’s February and since it’s a week away from my big (birth)day, I decided to share some of my personal romantic movies and what moral of the story I got from them (spoilers may occur). 

-Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)

Summary : A couple undergo a procedure to erase each other from their memories when their relationship turns sour, but it is only through the process of loss that they discover what they had to begin with.

Moral of The Story : You meant to meet a person in your life, fall in love and suffer heartbreak, and learn from it.

After watching Her, I’ve come to realize that Spike Jonze is a genius when it comes to combining sci-fi and romance. Yup, if there’s actually a place where you can erase bad memories, it will surely booked by many people. What sticks to me from this movie, aside on how both Kate Winslet and Jim Carrey can break their own image by being Joel and Clementine, was a heartbreak could be unbelieavebly unbearable that you want to erase it all from your mind. But unfortunately, it’s not that easy. Naturally, erasing the pain memories should erase the great ones as well. How can you know you reached a high point when you skip the low point? Watching ESOTSM made me aware how heartbreaks and pain are necessary to feel the happy moments. Both come as a complete package.

Ruby Sparks (2012)

Summary : A novelist struggling with writer’s block finds romance in a most unusual way: by creating a female character he thinks will love him, then willing her into existence.

Moral of The Story : No matter how perfect your dream girl is, you still have to deal your own issues in order to work in a relationship. Nobody is perfect.

It’s a tempting though to create your own spouse character, then it becomes a reality. You can create your own Ryan Gosling or Scar-Jo that matched your personality, but after a while reality should struck. Not about whether people saw you enviously or strange, but more from issues from yourself. In this case, how Calvin treat his girlfriend before and now is still pretty much the same. So you can search for the perfect person, but what about issues from yourself? Have you treat your spouse the way it should be?

500 Days of Summer (2009)

Summary : An offbeat romantic comedy about a woman who doesn’t believe true love exists, and the young man who falls for her.

Moral of The Story : If she doesn’t love you, she’s not for you. When you hit a low point, it’s a great time to rediscover your dreams.

It seems that I couldn’t help not to mention this movie when it comes to romance favorites. Told with unlinear storyline, it’s a simple phase of a young man meeting who he thought the girl of his dreams. Often life gives you bitter moments to learn, just when you have faith on something. It’s a phase of Tom to learn that hope and reality can be misleading. I always thought that every low point there’s an opportunity to start again, much like 500 Days of Summer. You have to meet a couple of Summers before you meet the real ones.

Serendipity (2001)

Summary : A couple reunite years after the night they first met, fell in love, and separated, convinced that one day they’d end up together.

Moral of The Story : We don’t have power to pick the ones we fall into. If our spouse looking for another person before wedding day, chances are there’s something missing in the relationship.

When I first watched Serendipity, I actually felt horror. I thought what it must’ve been for Sara and Jonathan’s fiancee, how horrible it must be for them. But what sucks is that, sometimes you can’t exactly know if there’s something wrong in the relationship only after you found the perfect person. I might experience a little similar experience, so feeling miserable and incredibly happy in this situation is very normal. In every relationship, there’s a risk of failing. As cliche as it sounds, heart speaks what it wants. So, if you want to get your life in order, start by following your instinct.

The Before.. Trilogy (1995, 2004, 2013)

Summary : A young man and woman meet on a train in Europe, and wind up spending one evening together in Vienna. After nine years, they encounter each other again on the French leg of Jesse’s book tour. Years later both went to Greece and discover obstacles despite having relationship for several years.

Moral of The Story : Create a spontaneous move once in your life (like walking with a friendly beautiful stranger you meet in the train), and you’ll never regret in the rest of your life. An affair starts from attraction but to keep going on it needs great connection. If you meet someone who can level your knowledge, philosophy and challenge you everyday, he/she is a keeper.

I think why lots of people can connect to Celine and Jesse, is because their conversations and dialog about life and love were very honest and true. They show real chemistry. Basically, if you search for a life partner, you need a one who won’t be tired talking to you for hours. There it is, a great relationship is the one where you can be yourself and speak your mind, fight and love expressively and be on the same page.

(all summaries are from imdb.com)

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Readers, do you have any romantic movies that taught you something good? Or, any thoughts?