My Dear Breastfeeding Boy,Our breastfeeding journey has come a long way. I wouldn't say that there were too many hard times to speak of, but as I was feeding you in bed today, I was thinking back on where we came from and I felt proud.
You were a great feeder from the very beginning. You latched on and suck, suck, sucked all the time!
You didn't want to open your mouth wide enough, however and I got sore very quickly. It suddenly became very painful to feed you and it wasn't the joyful bonding experience that I imagined it being.
You and Daddy were my rocks at this point. I kept saying "I can't do this. It hurts too much." But thinking of us nursing in the future, pain free and easily, got me through. Also Daddy played a huge part. He held your little mouth open to help you latch correctly and he held my hand when it hurt. You should thank him someday.
Once you learned to open that mouth wider, we had to deal with another problem: overactive letdown. My milk would come spewing out so fast and you would choke and sputter. I felt so bad for you. I researched and researched how to help this not to happen and I found some things that worked for us. The thing that helped us most was learning to nurse lying down. It took you a little bit to get used to it. You would bury your head in the mattress and get frustrated. Today, at eight months old, lying down is the only position you will nurse well in.
It is so comfortable lying down, taking time out of the day to go into a cool, quiet room and just be mother and son. The way you look up at me makes my heart melt. I see the love in your eyes. Can you see it in mine, I wonder?
I love the way you smile when you eat. I see the corners of your mouth turn up, but you are still sucking away! So sweet.
The feeling I have, that my body is nourishing you, is indescribable. It is truly an experience that everyone should have. I consider myself blessed that we were able to feed with such ease. Some people can't, and that makes mommy sad.
I want you to nurse as long as you need to. I will not rush you to leave the breast, nor will I force you to stay. You tell me when you are ready. Someday, you will be an independent boy who doesn't need mommy's breast for nourishment and comfort. I hope, however, that our bond will last through the years. You and I will have this connection that nobody can understand but it will be strong and real.
I love you my sweet boy.
Love,
Mommy
