I'm a mother, no I'm not complaining. I'm a proud mother. The day the baby was born, I was on cloud nine. People started looking at me with respect, suddenly I seemed to have been elevated by several steps at once. In an otherwise lack luster life, this was one moment to be proud of. Otherwise I can't recall any other moment which I can really talk about. Like everyone else I went to school, like everyone else I was good at some subjects, not good at some, like everyone else I was married off, husband yeah he was also there, sex was also there and then came the kid and my world changed, very much like how they show in the films. Suddenly several people almost the entire family, neighbors, friends everyone was interested in me. Everyone wanted to see my kid. I loved the attention, something I never got in my life. You may say the attention was not intended for me but I don't quite agree. You may also wonder why I didn't get any attention in my life, but look at any woman around you where does she get any importance. No I'm not one of those who fight for everything. No no I'm not those feminist types. Only such types garner all the attention but to what gain, my parents told me they can never be happy. Of course how can they be happy? Which man on earth will like them, men only like women who are one step behind them. A woman who makes the house, a woman who talks when needed but doesn't raise her voice, a woman who might earn but slightly less than her husband..... and all that. Forget all this, I was talking about my kid, you might say having a kid is also something everyone does, there is nothing to be proud of. I don't know all that, but every since the kid has come into life I have never been bored, run behind to feed it, run behind to clean its poop, keep a watch that it doesn't fall down and all those things. I have always been busy. And what about me, well don't you think it is all about me. Don't people say it is his/her mother when my son/daughter achieves something.
These things, I have been saying them since ages. I wonder if I really believe in them or I'm making myself to believe in them by repeating them again and again. It is comforting to say these things. The kid, it has sucked out life from me. Feed it, clean it's poop, run behind it, see that it doesn't fall down and then comes the whole thing of its school, making lunch and all those millions of things which have no end. The day the kid came into the world, it was the most painful day literally. I wonder why I even signed up for it, what was I thinking? Well I'm sure I wasn't thinking. This perfect picture of a marriage, family, kids and living happily ever after, this is what I have been seeing all my life, be it in education, entertainment, media everywhere. To this end is what everyone is cultivated to aspire to. I wouldn't say it was always bad, yes there were a few good moments but truly these institutions are over rated. Coming back to the kid, I see compromise at every step, damn, I can't even watch the program of choice and bear with the dumb right wing cartoons. Travel, don't even mention it, I have cremated it long ago.
I know it is not right to say these things and people will probably call me insane but it is alright, after all I have lived all my believing and making my self believe in this horrific little fairy tale, some deviations are allowed.
