I am not afraid, I am not shy, I can tell you whatever I want.This is the voice of a person who knows who they are and where their value lies.
I remember when I could barely say a word to anyone because of fear. I was so scared of both the known and the unknown.
If I needed to go see a friend, I would rather tell my parents I was going to go read or something, people called it lies(yes it is) but I called it lack of self confidence. What would have stopped me from telling them the truth, since I could tell them I needed to step out.
I had to make it a conscious effort to start telling myself, you don't loose anything when you speak out.
It's beautiful if we begin to understand that what happens to us are the things we attracted our way.
Most times we become victims of people speaking to us without respect because they know they have got us tied down and we can't speak back.
But then will this way of life be an influence to people.
It's high time we begin to look at ourselves as who we truly are.
And who are you?
You are a leader but how do people identify the leader inside of you? They only identify the leader that you are when you act like it and one of these vital actions is Self-Confidence.
Self Confidence builds who you are, makes people appreciate you and makes people follow you.
People want those who can speak for them. If you are scared of speaking, they are a lot more people who are scared but waiting for that one person to speak out.
And just at that moment you do this, people begin to give you the respect you deserve.
How then do we build self confidence:
- Reconcile with your past: you might be going through a phase of getting scared to try something or say something because it had happened in the past and it didn't turn out right.
Failure and success doesn't just happen in business it also happens with self. If you tried communicating with a large audience in the past and it didn't work out well. Try again. You can never build yourself if you drop at first try.
- Stay positive; learn to stay positive even if it seems like what you are saying or doing doesn't make much sense.
It will help you stay mentally intact for the next time. If you cannot be your own cheerleader who else will. Keep telling yourself I did it well now but I have to improve.
The moment you say oh no this didn't go well, automatically the fear of trying that same thing comes in and it kills your confidence.
- work on your mind: be careful of what gets into your mind and how you let them affect you. So you do not end up falling victim of the subconscious negatives.
By this I mean, maybe you've heard people say after an interview "this is the most terribly interview I have ever come for", just when it's your turn to step.
Caution! Caution!! Caution!!!
Learn to keep your shock absorbers up and going because remember you have that interviewer to influence.
I remember when I was to go in for one job interview and everyone was trying to run around, use the restroom and all sorts because they were tensed and afraid then one of the ladies asked me, why are you not scared, I answered her because I am not scared of you.
The truth remains that most of the places we get scared and loose our confidence, we forget that they are human beings.
I didn't know this secret until I started training my mind. If I ever had to go in to talk to a large crowd or when I am at the verge of loosing my confidence. I quickly start thinking of people who I am not scared of or rather who I am free with, maybe my mom or my sister or my dad and it automatically gets me smiling and that builds my self confidence.
To lead and be a person of influence you have to be a person of confidence. People don't follow people who struggle with their words,
People do not follow people who are not firm on their decisions.
Finally;
- Invest in yourself; if you are an authority in what you do, you automatically have the confidence you require and how does this come? With constant investment in self
So now it is up to you.
What ways will you train yourself to be more confident? What struggles do you have. Try these steps and If you have any questions on how to build your self confidence so as to be seen as a leader, drop it in the box below, I will be glad to help.http://feeds.feedburner.com/LifesTreasury
