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38% Of You May Not Be Able To Read This

By Nottheworstnews @NotTheWorstNews

CNBC reports that according to a Gallup survey, 58% of Americans still have their VCRs, which is more than the numbers who have desktop computers, iPods, video game consoles, or tablet computers.

62% of Americans do own smartphones, though, so chances are you can email a selfie to Grandma indicating how much you enjoy the Colecovision console she just sent you for your birthday.

3 Questions That Arise From This Story

1. Are people in America answering the phone and telling people exactly what electronics are in their home? We are assuming these kind of surveys are done by phone, but since the surveyor is taking such a keen interest in VCRs, perhaps they are being conducted by CB radio.

2. If the surveys were conducted by CB Radio, did the surveyor ask where the nearest “Smokeys” were hiding? This type of question with disregard for the law suggests detailing your electronics inventory was a worse idea than initially thought.

3. Why are we wasting time writing these entries on the internet? We are totally going to corner the non-competitive market for new material on VHS tapes! (Note: the new material will be are entries glued to the cassettes of old Police Academy VHS tapes, since we aren’t going to find a 1980s Camcorder and act news out.)


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