We at NotTheWorstNews check out the blogs of our recent followers whenever we can. Yesterday we visited the blog of popular blogger mothstoaflame, who shares dating stories, so check out her blog to read some. She either gives the men “code” names, or dates men named after inanimate objects. Either way, it may be potentially embarrassing for some men in similar circumstances if they figure out they’re the subject matter of a blog after a disastrous date. But you’re reading NotTheWorstNews, so here are three worse possible situations to remind said men it could be worse…
1. Reading a date was bad on a blog, and thinking it might have been your date, but still being a bit uncertain. “Yes, the conversation was awkward, almost non-existent,” you think. Until you realize during the entire date, you were a ghost, just like Bruce Willis in the Sixth Sense. Yes, now that whole awkward moment when she said “I see dead people and dead cattle – why did you have to order that 32 ounce New York Striploin, jerk?” part of the conversation makes sense. As does the fact that the automatic faucets never worked in the men’s room in the restaurant when you waved your hands underneath them for three hours straight. But it does explain why she left after two and a half hours and wrote an angry blog about you, which is too bad because she may be the only person in town who can actually see you.
2. Reading a date was bad on a blog, and then realizing you were actually reading a recipe for beef bourguigon at the Julie/Julia project blog on Salon.com. Well actually, a pirated version of the recipe since Salon.com doesn’t seem to have the blog any more. Anyway, you must have got really got drunk on that date to stumble home and confuse online recipes with dating reviews! But now that your memory is coming back, you recall the inspiration for your drunken online antics. It seems you kept telling your date about your lifelong goal called the Kevin/Kevin project, where you plan on seeing every episode of Kevin James’ television hit, the King of Queens, during a 365 day period. Just not the next 365 day period because you don’t own a TV, DVD player, or King of Queens box set. And your name’s not really Kevin. You made that part up just in case the date went awry, and your date wrote about it on a blog.
3. Reading a date is bad on Twitter in real time as you sit across from your date. Hashtag #OnALousyDateSomebodyPleaseCallMyNumberSoICanGetOutOfHereAndBuySkittles seems initially excessively cruel, but that’s what you get for dating the self-proclaimed Queen of Mean @LisaLampanelli. Well, you also get her message retweeted by many of her hundreds of thousands of followers, making your bad date a world-wide trending topic! Still it could be worse. You can at least say you went on a date with the Queen of Mean, which is far more impressive than if she sent one of her interns, like the Duchess of Meanshire.
