Life Coach Magazine

2nd Childhood . . .

By Dreamchasa101 @dreamchasa101

"A man who views the world at 50, the same way he did when he was 20, has wasted 30 years of his life." - Muhammad AliWhen I was younger, I used to look at every adult like they were inferior to me.  Like they had this vast amount of knowledge and experience that would take me years to accumulate.  I felt like they were always right and I was always wrong.  I was about 17-years-old when I realized that this was far from the truth; not for all adults, but for many.  I noticed that there were people who were well into their forties that acted more like they were still in their twenties.  I think we all know or have met someone that fits into this category.To this day, I still don't know what contributing factors lead to this.  Maybe people get caught up in so many other facets of life, that they stop growing mentally.  I see a lot of people get caught up in dead-end jobs, drug use and overindulgence in the wrong activities which may have something to do with it.  I used to "really" wonder what was wrong with people like this.  I used to find it amazing when I met someone who had teenage children, but walked around acting like a teenager themselves.  An example would be your typical 50 something year old co-worker whose conversation is limited to that of a high school senior. It's makes you ask yourself, "What have you learned in the past 30 years?" "You don't have any good stories of life lessons you've learned in your journey?" Nope! Just the same old talk about how they can't stand their job, how they are going back to school (been planning it for the last 20 years), and how they sit at home and watch re-runs of sitcoms throughout the day.Rap artist "Nas" makes reference to a similar situation in his song entitled "2nd Childhood". In his song he talks about a 31-year-old ex-convict who still lives with his mother and smokes weed with his friends as they watch Comicview. This man is also a junior high school dropout who has children by different mothers. Here are the exact lyrics from the song, which - in my opinion - make for great poetry/spoken word.  [Nas]Yo, dude is 31, livin in his moms crib
Ex-convict, was paroled there after his long bid
Cornrows in his hair, still slingin, got a crew
They break his moms furniture, watchin Comicview
Got babies by different ladies high smokin L's
in the same spot he stood since, eighty-five well
When his stash slow, he be crazy
Say he by his moms, hit her on her payday
Junior high school dropout, teachers never cared
They was paid just to show up and leave, no one succeeds
So he moves with his peers, different blocks, different years
Sittin on, different benches like it's musical chairs
All his peoples moved on in life, he's on the corners at night
with young dudes it's them he wanna be like
It's sad but it's fun to him right? He never grew up
31 and can't give his youth, he's in his second childhood.
Unfortunately, I see a lot of this, especially in the black community.  Here is a clip from one of my favorite TV shows, Judge Mathis, which shows an example of how this trend continues to plague the black community (predominately).  Judge Mathis :The problem in the Black Community is Deadbeat Black Fathers.  I believe that in many cases, children are being raised by children, which is leading to generations of families that are socially disadvantaged in today's society.  We need people - especially parents - to begin to stand up and stop mentally stagnating themselves.  This will not only benefit them, but it will benefit their children and society as a whole. 
In today's world, it appears that the truly successful (depending on your definition) are the ones who are growing.  It's as simple as that.  Former basketball star Julius Erving nailed it when he said that, "The key to success is to keep growing in all areas of life - mental, emotional, spiritual, as well as physical."  While many equate success with money, notice that the Doctor says nothing about finances; although it is my personal philosophy that if a person is growing in all areas of their life, then money will come with thier lifestyle. 
From a Christian standpoint, my pastor related it to scripture when he said that if you want to grow in God, you have to be in repent mode constantly.  In the New Testament, the word translated as 'repentance' is the Greek word μετάνοια (metanoia), which means"to change ones mind".  This means that in order to grow, people have to literally change their way of thinking.  One should not think the same way that they thought last year, or even sometimes last week.  They should be constantly changing and constantly evolving. 
This type of attitude adjustment will ensure that more people - parents being the most important - will not let the words of Muhammad Ali go to waste. By the time men and women reach the age of 50, they will have the knowledge, wisdom and common sense that is expected of people their age and be able and willing to share it with the future generations. 

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