Family Magazine

10 Things Everyone Dealing with Fertility Issues Learns

By Lamamma @LAmamma1

Some couples are lucky enough to be able to conceive with ease. Others find themselves dealing with fertility issues and struggling to get pregnant. Even though you cling to the hope that it will happen eventually, the journey of trying to make your baby dreams come true can lead to a lot of trials and tribulations along the way. When you’re trying to conceive, and it’s not as easy as you had hoped, you find that there are lots of things that you can relate to and new things that you learn about getting pregnant.

Your Body Doesn’t Care About Your Plans

If there’s one thing that every couple trying to conceive learns quickly, it’s that everything can end up being scheduled around boosting your chances for getting pregnant. You might never have thought that you would have to drop everything so you could have sex, take a pregnancy test or check your temperature, but that’s what you find yourself doing. Your body ends up being in charge, from two-week waits to thinking about parts of your body you never thought you would spend so much time thinking about.

10 Things Everyone Dealing with Fertility Issues Learns

People Can’t Help Giving Advice

One of the most frustrating things about trying to conceive is the “helpful” advice from other people. You know they’re just trying to think of something to say and perhaps reassure you, but most of the time, they don’t have much to contribute. You either get basic tips for conceiving that you’ve definitely already tried, weird advice that you don’t want to try, or unhelpful platitudes that don’t help you feel any better. And then there are the stories about cousins and nieces who eventually managed to get pregnant after struggling for two months…

Weird Medical Stuff Becomes Normal

You never knew you could be so comfortable talking about reproductive medical stuff. But suddenly things like ovulation induction and “giving a sample” become matter of fact and the most normal things in the world. You become familiar with terminology you’ve never heard before, and you see equipment you never knew existed. It all becomes second nature, until you feel like maybe you could be a fertility doctor with all of your new-found knowledge.

You’re More Aware of Your Body Than Ever

Another strange consequence of your journey to conceive is how familiar you can get with your own body. Never before have you thought so much about your cervix or used the word mucous so often. Not only that, but you’re also constantly looking for signs that you could be pregnant, from late periods to changes in your breasts and anything else that might be an indication of pregnancy. You can’t help but think about what your body is doing all the time, although sometimes you might think you’re a little less in tune with it than you want to be.

10 Things Everyone Dealing with Fertility Issues Learns

Other People Conceiving Stirs a Mix of Emotions

When friends or family members get pregnant, it can be difficult to deal with. While you’re happy for them, it’s also a reminder that it hasn’t happened for you yet and you’re not sure when it will. Obviously, it’s not their fault, but you can’t help but irrationally feel that they’re waving it in your face. Even celebrities getting pregnant can cause you to feel jealous and wish everyone would stop talking about it. Sometimes you just have to accept those feelings but try not to let them get in the way of being happy for people you know.

Infertility Groups and Message Boards Have Their Own Language

A lot of people who are having trouble conceiving turn to online support groups and message boards. There are plenty of these places to share your experiences with fertility and find people to chat with. At first, they can seem like strange and confuses places. With so many acronyms to contend with, you feel like you have no idea what anyone is saying. But you can soon pick it up and even start using all of the terms yourself.

The Weird Remedies Can Sometimes Seem Tempting

You will often see a lot of strange advice for getting pregnant. Some of it is old wives’ tales that older generations will swear by, and other tips might be new-age alternative medicine stuff. At first, you might dismiss it all as nonsense. But as time goes on and you don’t get the results you want, it can become more tempting. If there is anything that you want to try, check with your doctor first. As long as it won’t be harmful, you could give it a go.

Everything Can Seem Like a Potential Sign

It’s difficult not to start seeing everything as a possible sign that you could be pregnant. From hiccups to an itch that you feel the need to scratch, every slight change in your body starts to become a potential indication that the wait is finally over. It’s tough to reign these feelings in, but you have to avoid assigning meaning to everything if you don’t want it to drive you crazy. It’s best to stick to the major signs of pregnancy, like a late period and a positive test. Having said that, sometimes you just know.

You Might Have to Deal with Some Unexpected Ethical Issues

If you’re having any fertility treatments, you can find that you have to grapple with some big ethical questions that you might never have thought about before. How long should you freeze your eggs for? What would happen to them if you and your spouse split up? How long should you keep embryos for and is it right to destroy them? These questions can be tough to answer, but you might have to face them.

Good Support Is Invaluable

One of the most important things that you will learn when you’re trying to get pregnant is how important it is to have good support. Whether it comes from others who are going through the same thing or understanding friends and family, it means a lot to have people who care on your side.


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