Debate Magazine

You May Be a Republican If...

Posted on the 27 January 2015 by Lowell

You may be a Republican if...


You may be a Republican if..

+ You think health care for all is a bad thing.

+ You feel sorry for the rich.

+ You think poverty is a good thing and builds character

+ You think as more people are killed by guns we need more guns.

+ You think it’s wise to arm public school teachers.

+ You believe in privatizing prisons and schools.

+ You are certain $7.00 an hour is a good minimum wage.

+ You believe the rich pay too much in taxes now.

+ You insist public school teachers make too much money.

+ You’re convinced public school teachers have an easy job

+ You want to support private and/or religious schools with taxpayer money.

+ You are certain that even though defense takes up half of our budget the Pentagon needs more money.

+ You try to make it more difficult for the poor, the elderly and the minorities to vote.

+ You believe the government should control women’s bodies.

+ You often say the United States is a Christian nation.
+ You fight to force Christian beliefs in the public schools.
+ You care more about Wall Street than Main Street.
+ You would jeopardize Social Security by privatizing it.
+ You see nothing wrong in turning over pension funds to Wall Street.
+ You’re convinced only poor people abuse the welfare system.
+ You think the government should continue to subsidize the oil companies.
+ You’re not sure about this global warming business.
+ You’re against rules to force businesses to engage in environmental-friendly practices.
+ You would vote to defund the EPA.
+ You think the IRS is a dangerous because it collects taxes.
+ You think alternative energy programs are a waste of money.
+ You are adamant about sending children of immigrants back to their “home" country even though this is the only country they’ve ever known.  
+ You’re in favor of changing the tax system to benefit the wealthy.
+ You argue that rape is not always a bad thing and it’s usually the woman’s fault.
+ You hate Planned Parenthood because...well, just because...
+ You insist on the right to hang the Ten Commandments in courthouses.
+ You are certain our laws are based on the Ten Commandments.
+ You’ve put bombing Iran on your political agenda.
+ You don’t think the Constitution says anything about separation of Church and State.
+ You fight campaign financial reform tooth and nail.
+ You oppose improving relations with Cuba
+ You see no reason why gays and lesbians should have the same rights you do.
+ You eagerly and passionately fight regulation of financial companies and other corporations.
+ You see no problem with the widening gap between the very rich and the rest of us.
+ You see no problem with holding the country hostage and shutting it down to make a political point.
+ You think compromise with the opposite party means “my way or the highway”
+ You’re still not convinced that President Obama is not a Muslim.
+ You think atheists should be barred from holding public office.
+ You're sure that the theory of evolution is Satanic.
+ You believe the earth was created 6,000 years ago.
+ You have faith the U.S. is God’s country.
+ You are certain that the U.S. has turned away from God.
+ You are convinced that God will allow the U.S. to be destroyed unless your version of Christianity controls the government.
+ Your heroes are dead movie stars - Ronald Reagan and Charleton Heston.
+ You think torture is OK in some circumstances.
+ You’re not sure if slavery was a bad thing.
+ You know that State’s Rights supersede Federal Rights in some instances.
+ You believe states have the right to secede.
+ You have no problem with the Koch brothers spending a billion dollars to support their candidates in an election year.
+ You think the Supreme Court is still too liberal.
+ You want the Congress to spend most of its time fighting abortion and same-sex marriage.
+ You still believe that Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld are the “good guys.”
+ You know that Saddam Hussein had WMDs.
+ You know that most Canadians hate their health care system.
+ You’re sure that President Obama is a socialist or Marxist.
+ You’re convinced that the Tea Party had lots of good ideas.
+ Your heroes include Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann.
+ You believe the Constitution guarantees the right of every citizen to openly carry an AK-47.
+ You think the Stimulus did no good at all.
+ You agree with Ben Carson that the deficit has exploded under Obama even though the records shows it has decreased by 2/3rds.

+ You watch FOX News 24/7 and believe it is a true "news" station.
+ You're going to pray for me in Jesus' name!

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