Being a Blogger Mom who spends most of her time online, I hardly miss trending hashtags and online challenges related to my niche.
Recently I came across the #YESMom and #YESChallenge hashtags powered by the brand ActivKids Immuno Boosters. It was the no. 1 trending hashtag on two occasions and I also saw a couple of friends and bloggers sharing their stories and my curiosity was piqued!
A detailed investigation (read it a simple Google search), led me to this video.
My first thought - come on, I am not that parent who hovers over my child 24*7 and says a no to everything, I am definitely not like Mrs. Arvind. I give my daughter, Anshika freedom to do what she likes. I have enrolled her for dance class as per her wish. I buy her dresses of her choice and I even invested weeks to conduct her dream 'Frozen' themed birthday party. I am definitely a #YesMom.
I headed to this page and was thrilled to see that over 10,000 moms had shared their stories including some of my favorite celeb mommies by Tara Sharma, Mandira Bedi and Sushmita Sen! I found Tara's video particularly endearing because that is how I see myself as a mom!
After an hour or so, while I am busy in the kitchen, here comes my 5 year old asking me if she can join me in washing and peeling the veggies.
I can very well picturize a messy kitchen, double the cleaning work and a late dinner if I allow her to join me.
" NO " - spilled the words from my mouth!!
Suddenly, this above said video pops open inside my head and starts to play on its own, in loops!!
Struck by self-realization, I am forced to say a very feeble yes.
Result - She spilled water on the kitchen floor as she washed a carrot, smashed a tomato, mixed the cleaned and cut long beans with the peels, smeared her frock with tomato pulp and went back to her usual play as though she has prepared a grand buffet for the entire village.
Why did I say a Yes? I started to question myself while cleaning the mess.
Later that night, when dear hubby came home, my daughter was all excited to share the new things she learned while helping me. She did a quick demo of how to string out long beans. Shared how she discovered that carrot sinks in water and that Amma didn't peel tomato skin but potato skin was peeled before cooking.
It surprised me how much she gained from a frail yes from me.
The realization that I do restrict her from doing many things made me to take up the #YESChallenge.
The first two three days were difficult, but slowly I mastered how to say a yes and yet set boundaries.
I should say the changes are slow but very positive.
The things I stopped her from doing earlier is now allowed but with conditions. Like she can pack her tiffin box herself, provided there is a vegetable of my choice. She can wash the car with her dad, but she should wear the raincoat (smart me J) and so on.
This has raised her self-esteem and confidence. She gets to do what she wants, learns a lot of new things from it and I am also able to make her do what is best for her. It is a total win-win!!
Another thing is that, instead of saying (read shouting) firm NOs, I have started to explain to her why we stop her from doing certain things. This is helping her to differentiate between what is good for her and what is not. Result is a considerable decrease in tantrums and dramas as she is given proper reasons instead of plain denial.
The other day, instead of having a usual playtime at home, we went out for a cycling in the park as per my daughter's long time wish. If it were before, I would have said a no to cycling under the scorching sun. But now I am a #YESMom and I have learned to say yes. Not that feeble yes, but a confident firm YES that can bring in a lot of positive changes in my child's development.
You may have to clean a lot of mess, invest time and energy, worry about your child catching a cold or cough, give in to weird demands and wonder why you agreed to their whims in the first place. But believe me, every time you say a yes, it's an opportunity for them to learn, explore and grow physically and mentally. So moms, take up the #YESChallenge and be a #YESMom just like me.
Remember to share your stories and you could score an invite to #YesMomDay where none other than the delightful Mandira Bedi will be sharing her experience on how the #YesMom movement has changed her life! Also get an exclusive chance to attend the launch of the brand ActivKids Immuno Boosters and other exciting activities. Read more about it here.