Wii Warriors

The girls have Wii marathons. They will get into a groove where they play certain Wii games for hours. They are very competitive. The blond twin especially acts as if the outcome of every game is going to change the fate of the world.
One day the brunette twin decided to abandon her Wii marathon and take a nap. She was tired and wanted to sleep. The blond twin asked me to play. Until that moment I had spent exactly zero minutes with the Wii controller in my hands.
The blond twin kept telling me what to do. Move here. Jump there. Hit that thing. Don't hit that thing. She grew increasingly frustrated when I didn't move the controller quickly enough. When I missed an important jump from one moving thing to another, her avatar came back to rescue me.
Or so I thought.
What she really did was kick me off into the boiling oil. Yes, the blond twin killed me in the Wii world. I said, "Why did you so that?" She said, "Are you kidding? I'm so much faster without you." I did say she was competitive about her Wii, right?
One day she was really frustrated with her sister about this or that. I said, "If you want I can play. Oh, that's right, you killed me the last time I played." She replied, "You weren't very good Mom."
From the kitchen Daddy said, "I think Oreo would have done a better job than you did." The girls laughed and asked the dog if he wanted to play.
To summarize, my daughter kicked me off the platform because she was better off without me. The consensus is that Oreo could do a better job than I did. I think it's safe to say my Wii career is over before it really started.