The tortured poet has spoken:
" Recently I was made aware that AI of 'me' falsely endorsing Donald Trump's presidential run was posted to his site. It really conjured up my fears around AI, and the dangers of spreading misinformation. It brought me to the conclusion that I need to be very transparent about my actual plans for this election as a voter. The simplest way to combat misinformation is with the truth. I will be casting my vote for Kamala Harris and Tim Walz in the 2024 Presidential Election."
This is a very dangerous time for Trump because he will feel the urge to say something negative about Swift's crowd sizes, her fans, etc. and, if he pokes that bear - he's not likely to survive the backlash. Meanwhile, "The simplest way to combat misinformation is with the truth" - that's about the smartest thing anyone has said since 2016!
Now that we have the most important thing that happened out of the way, let's talk about last night's debate, between Donald Trump, who knocked out Joe Biden in round one and now faces Kamala Harris in round 2 but, before we begin - do you remember a single thing Trump said in round one? No one does, apparently.
Let's break it down. Trump, as expected, came in hot and heavy with his greatest hits. You know, the ones where facts take a vacation. He had the audacity to call Kamala a Marxist. Now, considering her career as a prosecutor who wasn't exactly known for storming the Bastille, that claim falls apart quickly. "She's a Marxist. Her father is a Marxist professor in economics," Trump claimed, probably hoping his base wouldn't Google that as Dr. Donald Harris (from Jamaica, mon or, as Trump likes to say " Her Black half ") was a Professor of Economics at Stanford University.
Dr. Harris's 1978 book, " Capital Accumulation and Income Distribution," is dedicated " to Kamala and Maya." In the early 2000s, Dr. Harris was an Economic Consultant to the US Government. Harris said the reason he chose Stanford was " I went to each one of the top 10 programs in the country, and nobody else took me to the faculty club." Kamala followed in his footsteps, studying Economics at Howard as an undergrad.
But that's just par for the Trump course, isn't it? Half-truths, complete fabrications, and wild-eyed conspiracy theories that wouldn't even make it into a bad Netflix docuseries. At one point, he even repeated the right-wing fever dream about Haitian migrants in Ohio eating people's pets. That claim is as real as Trump's natural skin tone, and fact-checkers didn't even need to break a sweat to debunk it.
Meanwhile, Harris? She didn't need to scream or match Trump's chaotic energy. Instead, she leaned into a strategy that I think future political analysts will call " Poke the Bear and Watch Him Dance." She let Trump take the bait every time. She mocked his shrinking crowds, a point that clearly hit home (captured nicely by Jon Stewart above), as Trump, never missing a chance to argue about attendance figures, boasted about the " biggest rallies in the history of politics." Which, considering he couldn't even beat his own 2016 numbers, is like saying you're the tallest guy at a hobbit convention.
But let's not pretend Harris is walking on water here. She sidestepped a lot of her own vulnerabilities, particularly on issues like fracking and border security. When asked about her policy reversals, she got real slippery. Instead of directly addressing her record, she pivoted to - you guessed it - attacking Trump's upbringing, which, while satisfying, wasn't exactly the answer viewers were hoping for.See - how easy is that? Vote for me and I too will be a dictator " Heads, spikes, walls " as Tyrion Lannister would say - only my walls would run through Congress, where what's left of the opposition could watch quietly when I address the nation...
Trump give Harris more ammo than a Texas gun show. On abortion? He fumbled, hard. His inability to stick to a position made him look like a guy trying to sell you a broken car by describing how great the ashtray is. " I won't support a national abortion ban," he said, but then immediately gave a nod to his running mate J.D. Vance, who sure as hell does. Harris, by contrast, took a strong stance: no bans, Roe v. Wade protections, full stop. Even her campaign said the abortion exchange tested well in swing states, and why wouldn't it? Voters are sick of the whiplash from Republicans who can't figure out how draconian they can or should be.
Trump's super-lame retreat to " giving decisions back to the states " is EACTLY why Roe v Wade was decided in the first place. It's not "making America great again" if we're regressing to the horrors of a time when the rich (of course) could simply travel to abortion-friendly states to bury their mistakes (obviously something Trump is very familiar with) with so many women dying each year from illegal abortions that it was a leading cause of death before 1973.
Studies show that access to abortion has significant effects on women's educational attainment, career opportunities, and economic stability and criminalizing abortion means doctors are afraid to help a woman who is having complications for fear of being brought up on murder charges. Of course, that won't happen much because hospitals won't admit you in the first place! And, of course, there will be " CSI: Miscarriage " - where women who are suffering the horror of losing a baby will also be investigated as a potential murder suspect - fun! Also a great way to persecute your political enemies, right?
The historical irony here is rich. Trump, a man who literally incited an insurrection, trying to claim he's the defender of American Democracy, is about as believable as O.J. Simpson writing a book called "If I Did It Again." Harris hit Trump hard on this: Jan. 6, the stolen election lies, his cozying up to dictators like Viktor Orbán who, by the way, Trump hilariously called "one of the most respected men in the world" and used Orbán's recent quotes to support himself! Tone deaf much? Sure, Orbán is respected... in the way a mob boss is respected. Harris's line about world leaders laughing at Trump? Right hook to the ego -and it landed hard! Trump immediately swung back, but instead of addressing the point, he rambled about his imaginary crowd sizes. Classic.What's truly terrifying (and here is where the humor ends) is that Trump's most unhinged moments were the ones his base is most likely to cheer for. His rant about Ukraine, for instance. " I could end this war in 24 hours," he boasted, without a shred of a plan. You could almost see the thought bubble over Harris's head: Yeah, you'd end it by handing Kyiv over to Putin on a silver platter. She even said as much, accusing Trump of wanting to " give Ukraine to Russia," which, considering his past " love letters " with Putin, isn't exactly far-fetched.
Trump bemoaned the death of innocent people in Ukraine (the Russian soldiers, actually) which is interesting since, if they dared to try to immigrate here - he'd hunt them down like dogs! And speaking of boarders, Trump challenged Harris to walk into the oval office tomorrow and close the borders - something he failed to do for 4 years - yet if he can end the war in a day like he boasts - then all the lives lost from here on in are on his very narrow shoulders. Hypocrite? Liar? Charlatan? Delusional? Sophist? Xenophobe? Demagogue? They all apply...
Kudos to Harris for NOT name-calling as she also tore into Trump's record on Afghanistan, bringing up the HORRENDOUS deal he negotiated with the Taliban. She held back, simply calling it " one of the weakest deals you can imagine." Trump, of course, flailed defensively, bragging about his diplomacy with the Taliban, because, you know, nothing screams " strong leadership " like letting 5,000 militants loose, acting surprised when it all goes to hell and then blaming the people who had to clean up the mess. You know, like he did with Covid.
After the debate ended, instead of retreating to lick his wounds, Trump did something you never see a presidential candidate do - he strolled right into the spin room to personally declare victory. That's right, the man who just got proverbially smacked around for 90 minutes walked into a room full of journalists and campaign operatives as if he had just won the Super Bowl. It's like Rocky, after losing a bloody TKO, insisting to the press that he actually knocked Apollo Creed out - everyone saw the fight, but here's Trump, gloves still on and not a scratch on his ear, denying the reality we all witnessed (like his last Administration).
Typically, the spin room is a circus of campaign surrogates and spokespeople trying to convince the media that their candidate didn't just embarrass themselves on national TV but Trump couldn't stand the idea that anyone else might get the last word - especially after a night where Kamala Harris turned him into her personal piñata.
Trump marched in and started telling anyone with a microphone that this was his best debate performance ever. That's right, the same debate where he spent 90 minutes defending his criminal charges, spewing bizarre conspiracy theories about migrants eating pets and struggling to string together just one coherent sentence on abortion - a debate in which he ACTUALLY said he had "concepts of a plan" for Health Care - less than 60 days before he wants you to vote for him! It would be so funny if it were not so tragic - like Macbeth except the witches are Fox News pundits, the dagger is a Twitter account, and instead of 'Out, damned spot!' it's " Person, woman, man, camera, TV!" (the Trump intelligence test)
Trump's post-debate victory lap is less 'sound and fury, signifying nothing' and more 'sound and furious, signifying everything wrong with our political discourse.' His boasts about his performance are like Lady Macbeth's handwashing - compulsive, delusional, and completely detached from reality.
In this tragicomedy, the 'concepts of a plan' for healthcare might as well be Banquo's ghost - always promised, never seen, and haunting the Republican party. And just as Macbeth's ambition led to his downfall, Trump's insatiable need for adulation and power threatens to drag down not just himself, but the entire democratic process - especially his sycophantic followers in the GOP!
The real tragedy, though, isn't just Trump's performance or his claims about it. It's that millions of Americans are willing to applaud this political theater, mistaking bluster for strength and incoherence for strategy. In the end, we're left wondering: is this a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing? Or is it something far more dangerous - a calculated dismantling of democratic norms, disguised as political entertainment?
Either way, one thing's for sure - this is one Shakespearean drama where ' exeunt, pursued by a bear ' might actually be preferable to four more years of this particular leading man.
According to reporters on the ground, Trump was delusionally beaming as he rehashed his greatest hits from the stage. He boasted about the size of his rallies, defended his ludicrous claim that world leaders were asking for his return (cue the Viktor Orbán shout-out), and, of course, whined that the moderators were out to get him. He acted like a man who believed if he could just SAY it went well enough times, maybe the World would believe him (a trick he learned from " Mein Kampf "- the only book he ever read, apparently). It's classic Trump-a reality TV star's belief that if you control the narrative, the facts don't matter.
Trum did this in front of the same journalists who had just spent the entire night fact-checking his lies and reporting on his meltdown. He operates on the theory that if you gaslight hard enough, reality doesn't stand a chance. And maybe not as Trump has pulled stunts like this before. Remember when he called the 2020 election " the most corrupt in history " and then tried to overturn it while claiming victory? Yeah, it's the same playbook. Trump doesn't concede; he rewrites the narrative mid-sentence, even as the walls are caving in around him.
In the end, this was Trump playing to his strengths or, more accurately, to his delusions. He didn't care how bad he looked during the debate because he knew he could walk into the spin room afterward and simply declare himself the winner. For his supporters, that's all they needed to hear. For everyone else? It was just another surreal chapter in the ongoing reality show that is Trump's political career, complete with its own alternative facts.
