I have had a particularly busy week considering I have an inflammation of my tummy......which is possibly the worst symptom I have had and that says a lot. This aside I have managed a fair amount this week, probably more than i was expecting which is a nice surprise for me. Productivity is definitely one of the harder things to keep on track with, I mean let's face it, how often do we all just collapse at the end of the day. I have left the washing for days, not had the energy to do any ironing and some days not even made it from my bed - which I have equally nick named my PIT OF DESPAIR! Luckily though, I have had a good week, mainly because my mental state has been in fight mode rather than sleep mode. So here are the small positives that I have achieved that have made this week one of the good ones.
I went out during a week night.......no you did read that correctly
So Wednesday night after work I was feeling OK; I know that is a shocker right there! Then I was invited out for tea and for once I could go. I know that many of you can understand the level of joy I felt at actually being able to say YES to something in the evening. There were limitations, which I had to bring up. I really couldn't be out later than 8pm - the fatigue and the pain would be getting too much by that point and I didn't want to go somewhere too crowded so that there would be seats left. Other than that though I was raring to get out and go.
It was a lovely dinner out, the place was quiet with plenty of seats and very relaxed. So relaxed that I even treated myself to a glass of wine.....really pushed the boat out for myself! Overall we weren't out for long, a coupe of hours that I managed quite well I think, mainly because it was close to public transport and I was sat down for most of it. The food was lovely, the company was perfect and it was a real change for me. There isn't a better way to lift your spirits.
I have got back to my exercise plan
After being able to do very little exercise for a while, I have started back on my proper plan which has brought a smile back to my face. As you will know by now, I am a bit of a gym addict and not being able to do as much as I used to be able to has been one of the hardest things to overcome.
My new plan includes my walk to and from work which is 2 miles a day, 2 or 3 gym sessions of 30 - 40 minutes and the occasional swim. I have had to reconsider this week what I can actually do at the gym nowadays; weights for example are out of the question. So I have developed a new plan where I chose between a gentle bike ride, the cross fit machine on a low resistance or a quick walk on the treadmill. This week I have managed to go twice, which is more than enough. I didn't do as much s I had planned for, but just the feeling of getting a little exercise really lifted my mood and made me feel a little bit more like me again.
I have lived through an entire week of very little planning
Circumstances and extreme exhaustion have left me unable to plan as much as I would like to this week. Also remembering back too the last achievement update, I am trying to let go of some of the lupus control and plan less. So this week I have really relaxed into this. There have been many small instances that only a couple of weeks ago would have had me filled with anxiety. The Wednesday nights tea out is a prime example. This wasn't planned and it was completely unexpected, which would normally have had me getting stressed out, but I simply let it go. There have been many instances of this throughout the week.
Starting with a Sunday trip to the zoo that I hadn't planned in at all. The trip was excellent as ever, there was ice cream and lots of laughter. During the week I have not planned when I would go to bed, I have enjoyed the freedom of deciding for myself rather than being dictated to by the lupus. Even yesterday I went for a drink with my colleagues straight from work. OK, I left before 6, but I still went and it didn't cause me any harm. I feel I am really able to tackle the unexpected now, rather than hiding from them.
I hope you have all had a great week too and speak to you soon xox
