Politics Magazine

The Sporting Press

Posted on the 28 February 2014 by Erictheblue

Faceoff

I understand the Winter Olympics have ended.  I saw nary a quintuple axle, not because I have no interest but because they were on NBC, or ABC--something other than Nick Jr., anyway.  What I know about the outcomes, like that the U.S. hockey teams were not a disappointment to the Canadians, comes mainly  from chance encounters with the sports page in the break room at work. 

What is it about the Olympics that makes sportswriters daft?  I think I'd rather watch back-to-back episodes of Dora the Explorer than be subjected to another article like, say, this one.  There's a million hockey games, and usually the better team wins, but it seems that it's only in the Olympics that the outcome requires moral explanations of geopolitical import.  Americans are a resilient people, and our Olympic hockey team, by losing the bronze medal to the Finns, failed to display our true national character.  What an outrageous embarrassment!  These players are not patriots and no one on the team should ever be allowed to represent our country in international competition again.

God, what a dope. 


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