Family Magazine

The Mother of All Insomniacs

By Emilybeatrice @emilybeatrice

DSCF3302I don’t know what it is about us mums, but according to my extensive research (Googleing for 5 mins) insomnia is fairly common for us.

WHY? You scream, surly the never ending merry-go-round of childcare, washing, cooking, cleaning, work, blogging and the wiping of little noses, is enough to send us into a coma as soon as our tired little heads hit the pillow of our unmade beds… I wonder if the constant night feeds, puts us out of sync? If grabbing those 30 mins to yourself each night to watch re-runs of Dawson’s Creek (just me?!) mean that, like our offspring, we miss that tired window sometimes….. Unfortunately, unlike baby Roo this issue can’t be cured with a bit of boob and a snuggle with my blanky (v v v odd and disturbing if it could). So what to do??

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Well I’m heading downstairs to grab a Horlicks…. I vaguely remember seeing it in the cupboard recently, which given that I must have been the one to unpack it after the ‘big move’ a month ago, shows just how sleep deprived I must be. I don’t even know if I like the stuff……. Here are my tips to motherhood insomnia

  1. Grab a Horlicks  oh for the love of…. Don’t, don’t grab a Horlicks, it tastes like feet!
  2. Remember, those self-aware angsty teens with a vocabulary far beyond their years can wait…. Yes even Pacey!
  3. Don’t check on the children, yes I know they look beautiful when asleep but don’t let that cloud your memory of the other 12 hours a day
  4. Don’t start fretting that there is no way your children sleep for 12 hours (neither do mine, It just sounded good)
  5. Do, make a to-do-list
  6. Don’t write to-do-list then sing ‘Hang me on the wall’ to the tune of ‘Fly me to the moon’, (you’ll never get to sleep if you’re being a silly billy)
  7. Don’t do some cleaning…. (If I’d have said DO some cleaning you’d feel guilty for not, so better me take the option away from you)
  8. Do make a delicious Options wicked white chocolate
  9. Don’t let it go cold while you write a blog
  10. Noooo, don’t make another one; you’ll never get to sleep!!!

The mother of all insomniacs

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