As a nervous person I live in a perpetual state of fear, particularly as a writer. I fear that whatever I write isn't going to be good enough, that it is never good enough. I used to write for my own enjoyment as a teen, nowadays I feel a little paralysed by it. When I get into the right conditions for it though, my enjoyment comes back, and I get that thrill again that I used to.
Workshops, coursework and actually forcing myself to do it put me in the position of actually enjoying it again. But reading it out in front of people? Erk. I find it terrifying, a little like baring my soul to everyone for it to be picked at. I recently read something quite close to my heart at the last DGP open mic, and scared as I was, it did help me. I received a lot of feedback about my writing, and the majority of it helpful. It also put me in the position to read my work as it would be to a new reader. You know that feeling you get when your house is a tip and you see it through a guest's eyes as soon as they walk through the front door? It's a little like that. It showed me massive gaping areas in my work and helped me make it better. So yes, although I was so afraid I was shaking, it helped my work. As the old cliche says, feel the fear and do it anyway. But don't post it on t'interwebs, those folk are ruthless.
