Debate Magazine

The Continued Confusion of Delusional Christian Crackpots

Posted on the 20 July 2015 by Lowell
The Continued Confusion of Delusional Christian Crackpots[Photo of Franklin Graham pretending to speak for his god.]
You may remember the goofy Christian televangelist, Jim Bakker, who got into a lot of trouble a few years back when caught putting it to a woman other than his wife, Tammy Faye, she of the overblown hair and overdone makeup.
But that was not the worst of it.  He was tried for a couple versions of fraud and convicted.  He went to prison and Tammy Faye divorced him.
Well, believe it or not, Jimmy is back with a new wife and a new TeeVee program called, "The Jim Bakker Show," which features all kinds of screwballs - preachers and "Christian" rabbis who can predict the future based upon their interpretation of obscure biblical passages.
The latest message from Jimmy is that the agreement designed to prevent Iran from building an atomic weapon is the cause of the drought in California.  Not only so, but is also a sign of the 2nd Coming of Christ (who, of course, never came the first time!)
The "End Times" is a favorite theme of these Christian TV crooks, and one recent guest, an Alabama pastor by name of John Kilpatrick, informed the viewers of the show that God is punishing America because of "abortions, idolatry, homosexuality and fornication."
You'd think his pissant little god would have better and bigger things to worry about.
Now to Scott Walker, the ethically-challenged governor of Wisconsin.  It seems every election season we get delusional candidates who claim their god wants them to be prezident!  Palin was one and Rick Perry another during the last go-round.
Walker has the same notion.  He sent out an email to his supporters which claimed he was running for president as that was God's plan for him.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.  Sure wish this god would make up her mind!  And if this god wants Walker to be prez, she's the dumbest god I've ever heard about.
The right-wing Christianists are especially upset in these "End Times" with the Supreme Court ruling which gave homosexuals the right to marry.  They pontificate as to how marriage has never changed, and how God commanded marriage to involve one man and one woman;  even from those, like The Donald, who believe in serial marriage.
You'd think people who claim to be Bible believers would know something about the Bible.  The old Hebrew patriarchs all had multiple wives and mistresses and of course, wise ol' King Solomon had the most of all.  A thousand.
Not only so, but their savior, Jesus, was born out-of-wedlock.  His parents were never married so far as the Bible story goes! 
You may have heard about David Barton.  Barton claims to be an historian but he's nothing more than a Christian right-wing nutcase who enjoys rewriting American history to suit his narrative that the US of A is a "Christian" country.
Barton, who, unfortunately, has a lot of clout with the so-called "evangelicals," has
commented on his "WallBuilders Live" radio program that in the GOP primary, Christians must not vote for any candidate who "will not pledge to nominate Supreme Court justices who will overturn the court's recent gay marriage ruling."
Then there's Tom DeLay, the crooked former Majority Leader in the House of Representatives.  When Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell said that the ruling by the Supremes relative to gay marriage was the "law of the land," DeLay called on members of Congress to ignore McConnell "and start punishing the entire federal court system for the gay marriage decision by cutting courts' budgets, limiting their jurisdictions and impeaching judge (sic)."
So much for the Constitution, heh, Mr. DeLay?
On a more humorous note:  One of the more extreme Christian crackpots is Janet Porter.  She is full of conspiracy tales and has put together an anti-gay film called, "Light Wins."  She also is more delusional than most and has an ego the size of California.
She has let us in on a little secret.  It was her prayers that got George W. Bushki elected prez, and thus it will be her prayers which will reverse the gay marriage ruling of the Supremes!
Franklin Graham is a disgrace, a disgusting and perverse man who gives his religion a black eye every time he opens his mouth.  He, like other Christian nutcases, believes it is President Obama's support for gay marriage that will usher in the "End Times."  I would think for someone who is so ill-equipped to deal with reality, this would be a good thing, but evidently not.
He also note on his Facebook page that the decision by the White House to celebrate LGBT Pride month and the Supremes' "decision with Rainbow Colors may incite a lightning strike from an angry God."
My thought we would be so lucky if such a strike hit him in the ass!
And finally, I thought you'd like to know I ran into Jesus on the street the other day.  He was in central Florida because he was concerned about all the racism and hatred which continues to prevail in the area.  He thought it disturbing, especially when we have over 200 Baptist churches alone in our community.  
Actually, I didn't "run into" him.  I was walking by our downtown square when I noticed someone tending to one of our many homeless persons.  It was the Lord.  Jesus pulled out his iPhone and called 911 as the man was very ill.  Then he wiped the man's face and put his jacket around the man for he was shivering with the chills.  As the EMTs drove up, Jesus gave the man some money and blessed him by touching his head and chanting a few words which I didn't understand.
As the EMTs drove away, I asked Jesus about the coming election and about those who claim that God wants them to be president.  He looked puzzled and asked "Who are these people?"  I gave him some names.  He said, "I've never heard of them," and then went to tend to another homeless person sleeping on a bench. 

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