Lady Gaga put it best… “I live for the applause, I live for the way that you cheer and scream for me, put your hands up, make ‘em touch”
Applause is wonderful… that feeling of success, achievement, recognition, and the deep exhale that comes with finally being noticed for your extraordinary work.
Applause can be the salve to a lot of burns, the soothing comfort that keeps us in the game, just when we thought we might quit. The long awaited embrace after years at the grind. Applause can bring us to tears, lifting a weight off our shoulders as we feel that moment of arrival.
Applause can be everything.
But, applause is quick. It’s over before you know it. And, then what?
When we reach the top of that mountain, often we look around satisfied only for a split second before we see an even larger mountain. And, in an instant, that uphill battle begins again. “If only fame had an IV,” Lady Gaga writes.
Ain’t that the truth.
Fame, praise, recognition… when it fades away, what’s left? Sometimes, an empty feeling. And, just like a drug addict, if you keep chasing that applause, you will start to waste away.
For me, status is the world’s most dangerous drug, because it can lurk under the guise of “doing all the right things”.
Maybe the applause you crave comes from society (your parents, your friends, your neighbors). Maybe you’re living your life according to their expectations.
Or, maybe you crave the applause of your customers, and you’re ignoring your own instincts and pumping out things you don’t believe in, in the hope that it will make them happy.
It’s not about what decisions you make, it’s about why you make them.
If you’re making your decisions for praise and applause, one day you will look in the mirror and barely recognize yourself. You’ll suddenly realize the life you’ve created is not the one you want. You’ll look at your work, and your career, and it will feel like it was created by a stranger, a sellout.
Allowing the expectations of others to guide your decisions is like running on a hamster wheel. And you can only run on it for so long before you look up, notice the world around you, and decide to step off.
The opinions of others occupy both sides of a very dangerous coin. While criticism and rejection can leave us heartbroken, applause can leave us paralyzed and addicted.
So, what’s the solution?
The first step is to deeply understand why criticism and applause are so crippling.
An addiction to applause is really a fear of being insignificant, a fear we all have deep within us. Criticism lights that fear up. When we listen to harsh criticism, fear tells us that we have no value, that we don’t matter. Applause, on the other hand, temporarily alleviates that fear, that awful voice is silent for a moment, and that’s where the cravings set in.
The powerful fear of insignificance can derail your whole life if you let it. It can creep in and start to dominate your thoughts, your conversations, and your decisions.
Fear is built into our DNA. It’s hardwired into us to keep us safe from danger. And when we make the decision to act independently of the opinions of others, our fear shrieks in our ear, “but, you can’t survive without it!!!”
That voice says…
“People will make fun of you.”
“Don’t cross that boundary, you will be rejected”
“She’s wearing a watch you can’t afford, you better go back to that cubicle, keep your head down, and earn that steady paycheck, before the world passes you by”
“Don’t build what you love, build what will sell”
It’s easy to get swept up in that voice, because booms loudly each time we try to do something big. It tells us we are unrealistic, foolish, and silly (or maybe even greedy) for doing something for ourselves.
That voice wants us to stay small and safe (and unfulfilled).
Our best work, our most creative solutions, our career-shifting decisions, and our most profound successes all come the creative freedom we experience when we set fear aside.
So, how do we move forward?
For me, setting fear aside means constantly reminding myself to detach. It’s recognizing that my joy comes from creative expression. My happiness lies in the process, not the reward. My approval comes from within. I repeat the mantra, “I am not interested in applause. I’m interested in being brave.”
The frustrating reality is that there are no guarantees. There’s no playbook for a successful life. There is no recipe for applause. It comes and goes. Just when we think we’ve got it figured out, it changes.
So we must act independently.
Your proudest achievements will be those that came from within. The crowning moments of your career will come out of inspired decisions, not fearful ones. The actions you take when you stop listening to the criticism and applause… those actions will often get the most recognition, and ironically, applause.
It’s life’s biggest paradox. The key to finding external rewards is to let them go. The recipe for success is not giving a damn about it.
So, go make your art.
Do what you love, and the rest will come.
Your vision matters.
You matter.
Don’t live for the applause. Step off that hamster wheel. And, live for you.
