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Whether or not you are an introvert, if your child is introverted, it is your responsibility to be his supporter and encourager. The first thing to remember is that there is nothing wrong with being an introvert. Introverts can be just as successful in their personal and professional lives as people who are more outgoing. Being an extrovert doesn’t insure success, and being an introvert doesn’t condemn one to failure. Balance is the key to finding happiness and contentment in life. There are some important ways you can encourage your introverted child to make the most of his life.
Always let your child know that he is good at being the person he is and that you like him no matter what his personality is like. Everyone needs to be validated, adults and children alike. Also, don’t judge your child. You can make your child feel significant just by accepting him without reservations. Being a parent is a lifetime responsibility, and you want to have a decent relationship with your child, regardless of their behaviors which may or may not fit into your way of thinking and acting.
Social relationships are necessary and important for most people. Introverted adults who work primarily out of their homes have to have some communication skills, even if those skills consist of appropriate ways to email and use the phone. Along the same line of thinking, children need to be able to talk to schoolmates and teachers at a minimum.
Be involved with your child’s education. Know his schoolteachers and classmates. Notice the kids that your child interacts with. If you’re concerned that your child is suffering socially, one idea is to arrange for play dates with other children. It might be beneficial for your child to have a play date rehearsal with you and go over what might happen when he gets together with a friend.
On the subject of friends, keep in mind that while some children are happiest when surrounded by a lot of friends, other children will be completely satisfied with two or three good friends who share their interests. If you have more than one child, you will undoubtedly be aware of the fact that children born to the same parents can be social polar opposites. Again, introverts can be just as happy with a few strong friendships as extroverts are with many social associations.
Help your child discover his own unique talents and hobbies and encourage him in those positive pursuits. Your child will be drawn to others who have similar likes and abilities. That alone will help him feel accepted and appreciated. If your child is engaged in activities that he enjoys and has success in, he will feel good about who he is, whether he’s introverted or not.
As much as possible, give your child the tools that will enable him to be successful in his education and personal life. Most introverted children are naturally drawn to solitary pursuits. If you can, make sure that your child has supervised access to equipment that will encourage fun and learning. There are numerous computer games and activities that provide education and amusement that are entirely child-appropriate. Don’t leave out exercise either just because your child is inclined to spend time alone. Swimming, basketball and golf are just a few physical activities that will get your child outside and possibly even interacting with other kids.
Give your child a chance to grow. With proper encouragement, you never know where life will take him. Be a good example. If you’re an introvert like him, step outside your comfort zone enough to let him know it’s possible and often necessary to have positive associations with other people. If you’re an extrovert, take time to do social things at his pace. Don’t go too fast. There’s nothing wrong with being an introvert. Every person, even extroverts, has their own unique personality. It’s how your child deals with himself now that will determine the type of adult he will become.
Chad Hunter is a freelance writer for Depression Connect. Chad has been writing about depression and depression research for over 10 years.
