Strange Things I Have Photographed in the Suburbs

By Jennyphresh @feralpony

In my work as an amateur naturalist, I continue to catalog the oddities of that savage land known as Suburbia. Here is my latest collection of photographs snapped in the wilds of Southern Westchester.

Something old, something new, something borrowed, something thick and black and previously used by a burglar.

This Mamaroneck shop features grand-daddies, infants, occasional flames, and one very very small roast turkey.

So many people ignored this sign. So, so many naked people. What a clothing store!

Is it just me, or is this statue "shaking the dew off the lily"?

$2.00 additional for the large earwig.

"Don't look now, Mary, but there is a giant, grotesque ear with gnarly legs and toenails and shit walking behind you."

Spotted outside that corner bar that's been closed for 3 years now. The creature is fervently hoping it will become a wine/tapas lounge, rather than another dive.

Speaking of dive bars, this animal spent way too long at the "Town House II"—an establishment that is strictly "teeth optional."

The poster warning of the dangers of marijuana was spotted in a high school health classroom in Mamaroneck. It has little blue testes. Look closely at the hand dangling by his side. Now, wait for it...wait for it...