Body, Mind, Spirit Magazine


By Anytimeyoga @anytimeyoga

“I wonder if I should trim my legs before the funeral.”

They are noticeably hairy, having performed no kind of hair removal on them (other than a couple of days of wearing KT Tape) in approximately two months. I will be wearing skirts above the knee. To much of my family and home religious community — relevant for a church funeral — this is a significant social faux pas, possibly to be interpreted as disrespect for my grandmother.

Which, yes — ridiculous. It’s just my legs being my legs, after all. But at some point the hassle of responding to the judgment outweighs the hassle of taking the beard trimmer — not a razor, dear Flying Spaghetti Monster, never going to be a razor again — to my legs.

There is a part of me that prickles at the sake of conforming to beauty standards simply because it’s socially easier to conform to said beauty standards, rather than because I get anything actively positive out of it. In fact, I will actively miss my leg fuzz while it’s gone, though I know it will grow back. However, for the sake of minimizing the passive aggressive friends and family nagging — I do not need it, not now — it is a bargain I am willing to make.

“You could always wear stockings,” my husband offers. As in, pantyhose. I am sure he knows my answer before he makes the suggestion.

“Fuuuuuck that!”

Nylon stockings

[By Tranquil Garden (Own work) [GFDL (, CC-BY-SA-3.0 ( or CC-BY-SA-2.5-2.0-1.0 (, via Wikimedia Commons]

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