How many calories are in heroin?
— todd levin (@toddlevin) February 18, 2015
Do people that take showers know about lying horizontally in a bath?
— Carbosly (@Carbosly) February 17, 2015
Catch me on The Squeal Househogs of Pigfucker County
— Jocelyn Plums (@FilthyRichmond) February 17, 2015
"I love self defecating humor"
-don't you mean self deprecating?
*shitting in pants while laughing hysterically* "No"
— Steve Suckington (@SteveSuckington) February 17, 2015
people keep asking "if time travel is real, where are the time travellers?" theyre in my bedroom, showing me incredible futuristic sex moves
— thomas violence (@thomas_violence) February 17, 2015
