May 10, 2021 by Maggie McNeill
It's time for another of those articles so packed with idiocies that there was no way to do it justice in a news column. This one, by Charlie Keegan of KSHB in Kansas City, is not only crammed full of prohibitionist nonsense, but also littered with deeply-weird language and jaw-droppingly dopey puritanisms; the result is an article so utterly permeated with the reek of stupidity it should probably be considered hazardous waste.
A new initiative to stop sex trafficking in the historic northeast part of Kansas City, Missouri, encourages residents and business owners to "Report a John," with John referring to the name given to someone soliciting sex.
Some of these moronathons start slowly, but not this one, oh no; Charlie isn't merely content to call sex work "trafficking" and a tired, hackneyed scheme pushed by unimaginative busybodies "new"; he also feels compelled to helpfully explain that the state calls everyone accused of "solicitation" by the proper name "John", regardless of what their actual name might be. At least, that's what this sentence appears to say, though I suspect by "name given to" he actually means "prohibitionist slang referring to". And this is just the first sentence.
"What you have to do is focus on the demand because, without the demand, there is no supply. No one is in the sex trafficking trade if there is not a John," explained Scott Wagner...of [Yet Another Rescue Industry Scam Full Of Slackjawed Yokels (YARISFOY)]...
I'm really trying to keep my editorialization outside of the block quotes, honest I am. But when I'm faced with yet another semi-literate hick whose understanding of economics is roughly as grounded in reality as a Scrooge McDuck comic book, and who uses the bizarre phrase " sex trafficking trade " as though it actually meant something...well, give me a break, I'm only human.
...The new strategy debuted last week when a billboard went up at Independence and Cypress avenues. The billboard says, "This community does not tolerate buying prostitution."
I reckon it's no wonder that a billboard which can erect itself can also speak, but is it too much to ask that what it says actually make sense? Given that "prostitution" is the selling of sex, what does "buying prostitution" actually mean? That's like..."buying selling" or "purchasing vending". The kindest word I could use to describe the phrase would be "awkward".
The billboards and multiple smaller signs...encourage people to call 816-234-5220 to "report [the license plate number of] a John." The...prosecutor's office will then send a letter to the registered address for that license plate explaining the car has been suspected of soliciting sex.
It's not an accusation or a warrant, simply a warning...The new initiative also calls for publishing mugshots of people arrested for soliciting sex on a new website and in the Northeast News printed newspaper...
Noooooo, it's not an accusation at all. After all, only the car is "suspected of soliciting sex". I'm sure all those people (disproportionately young men of color, natch) who are publicly shamed and probably lose their jobs based on some busybody's mere suspicion will appreciate that distinction.
People found guilty of soliciting prostitution will be offered the chance to attend " John School "...
"Johns...need some help in getting over what could be an addiction"...
