Rule #15 – Stop Taking Pictures of Yourself

Like most of you, I have numerous Facebook friends that I find absolutely repulsive. The only reason I remain fake friends with them is so I can keep tabs on their hilariously awful lives and to share a laugh at their expense later on with my other Too-Cool-For-School friends. Does that make me an awful person? Quite possibly. But we can debate that another time.

What caught my attention during this most recent frenemy stalking exercise was how self-absorbed some of these folks are. I rifled through the latest photo album of a dearly detested “friend” and counted 37 pictures taken of her by her. Thirty-seven!! Of herself! No friends, no pets, no family. Just her, a Sony Cybershot and a full-length mirror. I do have to give her some credit though – her versatility definitely came through. This particular album included such classics as Smiley Face, Frowny Face, Tongue-Out-Silly Face, Sexy-Finger-on-Lip Face, Fake Laugh Face and Hand-on-Chin-Serious Face. She showed real range. But it begs the question, don’t you have any friends? They could at least hold the camera for you the next time you decide to star in your own glamour shoot (the flash bulb reflection in the mirror isn’t going to win you any photography awards). And why post all 37 of your photos to the web? They’re virtually identical. Just pick your favorite, make it your new profile pic (personally I’d choose Constipated Face.) and move on to something productive.

And by productive, I don’t mean posting a new status update for the 17th time today. Seriously, you’re congesting my news feed.