Community Magazine

Roger Federer Is Joining the Retirement Home Tennis Team

By Friday23

Roger Federer is an amazing tennis player. The man is unbeatable. He zips around the court like an 18 year old, sending back impossible shots, fielding balls way out of his reach. We need him on our team and we are going to make him an offer he can’t refuse. It’s time our tennis court was upgraded to the next level.

Come here for your retirement, Rog. We have unlimited tennis facilities and there are other sports being played here if you’ve if you’ve had enough with the little yellow ball. Your forehand shot will work smoothly here in the coffee lounge and I daresay your backhand will work overtime settling many arguments about chairs, coffee and such important matters. Retirement homes are not for retired old people who totter around aimlessly all day in search of things they cannot remember. We have decided to take in retired people of all ages. If you are a 33 year old and retired, this place is for you.

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Another thing, Roger, bring the kids with you. We are awash in grand-children and great grand-children, but we are pitifully short on regular children. We’ll get your kids out on the tennis court teaching some of the more athletic retirees how to smash the ball back over the net.

In addition, Roger, the accommodation is good and the food is great. Perhaps you will be able to convince the management to build a small bar in the lounge once you have converted this place to a genuine sporting retirement facility. It is you that will be introducing the sports end of this the retirement home. Oh yes, bring your Rolex with you, Roger.


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