Love & Sex Magazine

Realistic Expectations

By Maggiemcneill @Maggie_McNeill

I’m over 70 and no longer able to get an erection even with the meds available.  I’m in good shape, not bad looking and can afford it, but am reluctant to engage a girl.  What do you think?

Realistic ExpectationsOne thing that I (and nearly nearly every sex worker I talk to) wish men understood is that we really don’t care about most of the things men think women care about, and that includes most of the things some amateur women do care about.  We really don’t care about clients’ looks, age, relative levels of physical fitness, penis size, ability to perform tricks they saw in porn movies or anything like that; what we do care about is that our clients are polite, generous, clean, respectful, prompt, appreciative, gentlemanly and realistic about their expectations.  What I mean by that last is, it’s not a problem if a gentleman is unable to get an erection, understands that, and asks for activities that don’t require one (of which there are many); the problem only arises (no pun intended) if he believes a whore can perform the sexual equivalent of a resurrection, and gets angry at her if she can’t.  In my career I’ve had plenty of men, including many younger than yourself, who were suffering from temporary or permanent erectile dysfunction, and as long as they understood and accepted that we were still able to have a good time cuddling, kissing, playing with toys, engaging in kink and other such activities that don’t involve erections.  But when such a man expected some kind of high-level sexual witchcraft beyond even my considerable skills, it rarely turned out well.  My advice to you, then, is to find a mature lady whose company you think you’ll enjoy regardless of what happens in the bedroom; go into the date knowing your limitations and clearly communicate those limitations to her; and enjoy the journey rather than being hell-bent on reaching some kind of destination to which there may no longer exist a bridge.

(Have a question of your own?  Please consult this page to see if I’ve answered it in a previous column, and if not just click here to ask me via email.)


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