When I first realized, as a child, that I could see and feel things others could not, I was excited. As I grew older and began to understand how many social problems psychic perception caused me, I suppressed it.
Then in my mid-twenties I came to the conclusion that embracing my psychic abilities could solve many problems that could not be solved through intellect alone. As I started on this course, I naively thought that I could transform this curse into a blessing. I thought I could reconcile intuition with intellect, while making this social acceptable for a conservative father like myself.
I now understand that I will never be able to reconcile this; I will never be able to make it right. Men will always either mock me or be afraid of me because of what I can reveal about them. Women will see me as validating their often destructive emotional decisions or see me as some kind of spiritual fantasy man.
I can’t change this into an advantage, no matter how hard I try. And I can’t make it go away. All I can do is hone it to perceive more accurately.
So at 44, as a conservative, family-oriented father, striving to live a moral life, I can have come full circle. It’s a burden and will never been anything but a burden.
As a straight, conservative male psychic, I can give you good, accurate information. But don’t try to pressure me into liberalism (insanity). And don’t expect me to be happy about what I can do. It’s to be tolerated and managed, not celebrated.
