Hello and welcome to this months Love Every Body Body Positivity Workshop. The part we are focusing on this time is the chest.So how do I feel about my chest, I much more at ease with it than I used to be it has been a long and difficult road of self acceptance to reach the point where I am now and there are still days when I wish things were different.
So I am blessed with big boobs there is no two ways about it I currently wear a 36 JJ/K dependent on the bra manufacturer and the fit of the bra. I use the word blessed but many years ago that would have been changed to cursed!
I started to develop at a young age by the time I left primary school I was wearing my first bra and they just didn't stop growing by the age of 18 I was a 30E so very slim but with big boobs! I didn't like them as clothing never fitted properly and the only bras I could buy were frumpy and expensive. I spent most of my twenties despising my boobs as they started to sag and by the time I was 26 I was all set to have a reduction. I had reached a point where they felt like some weird alien entity and that they had attached themselves to me and I wanted rid of them! I can still remember going into to see the surgeon and having to show him my boobs his only reaction well your nipples are very low down I really wanted to reply yes I know I haven't seen them for years, please tell them I say hello!
Ultimately I didn't have the operation due to my moving back to Birmingham and now at a much older age I'm glad I didn't as although I ultimately wasn't able to breastfeed my son I managed to express some milk and had I had the op this would have been in all likelihood impossible. It still took me some time to start to love them, which was helped by going to places like Bravissimo for the first time and being greeted with lots of pretty bras which shockingly were available in my size! I started to find out how bras should fit and then realised just how much better I could look with a proper fitting bra on, my boobs were no longer on my tummy and I had a waistline!
I would be lying if I said I totally loved my boobs I still have days when I get cross because I can't fit them into an outfit or that my bras still cost stupid money so I am limited in how many I can have. I also wish that they were less saggy without a bra on I look ridiculous and I have lost count of how many times I have squashed them by turning over in the night!! Its also a running joke that when I do zumba I end up with two sports bras on to try and stop the bounce!!
I have also lost count of the amount of people who tell me I am lucky to have big boobs, my reply try living with them and then see how lucky you feel!!! I would love to be able to buy cheap bras and a swimsuit that doesn't look like it has been made by a structural engineer!
The one thing I can say is my hubby loves them and he has made me less self conscious of them and I now accept that they are a part of me and I should love them really!
