It's been a crazy few weeks friends; since December, we've had the holidays, all four of our birthdays, welcomed a new baby girl, moved to Georgia, Z started a new job, and we've been working on potty training. Most days, I'm a train wreck; I've been surviving on bottomless cups of coffee, encouragement from other moms, and help from my husband.
I don't have Baby Blues or Post Partum Depression so don't think that's where this is going. But I'm stressed. And that's normal, I get it.
I wake up anywhere from 7-8 and nurse Miss P. I take Nolan to the potty, get him breakfast, and scramble to make myself a cup of coffee or mix some Spark. I change her diaper, nurse her again, and hopefully get her back to sleep. I play with Nolan or put on a movie so I can get a little bit of work done with the blog. I try and read, write, or respond to comments since I sincerely try to respond to every comment I get.
But then he wants/needs me so I stop mid-sentence and scoop him up for hugs or snuggles or build the most awesome train track ever. Or "play with dat hair". By that point, someone is waking up and ready to nurse again. So I sit down, nurse, change, and nurse again. I repeatedly ask Nolan if he needs to go on the potty, get his lunch started, and try and chug some water since I most likely haven't had any at this point.
We eat lunch, I nurse and change Miss P, and play some more with Nolan. I do all of this while browsing Instagram/Twitter and responding to emails as they come in. I throw in a load of laundry, which I will probably forget about and have to rewash later that evening or the next morning even. I snuggle Nolan on the couch and cross my fingers he is tired enough to fall asleep so I can get some cleaning or work for the blog done.
As soon as Nolan falls asleep, Miss P inevitably wakes up. I feed and change her and wrap her in her Moby wrap so I can clean. I change the laundry, take something out for dinner, and sit down to get some more work done. Either that or I tackle cleaning the bathrooms, folding laundry, or sweeping up the mounds of dog hair that have been accumulating for days. Showers are out of the question at this point.
Well soon enough, Nolan wakes up and wants nothing but his mommy. So I sit with him until he wakes up, all while browsing social media and checking my email. I feed Paislee (again) and change her (again…see a pattern?). Once Nolan is ready to socialize a little, I head back to the computer to try and get some work done. If he wants me to play with him, I stop to do so. We paint, we read, we play trains or dollhouse, and sometimes, we just sit and snuggle. These times are some of my favorites.
When Z finally gets home, he takes over playing with the kids so I can start dinner. He's been working really late and if I'm lucky, he's home before 6. I start dinner and then wouldn't you guess? P needs to nurse again. So I stop, and sit with P and Nolan because he wants to be with me at all times. I can't say I hate it but it definitely takes a toll when I have two kids on my hips at all times. But like I said the other day, I will miss this at some point and I'm cherishing every minute of it.
So I finish nursing and finish dinner, and then Z does the dishes while I get Nolan ready for bed. We play a little, take a bath, and then settle on the couch for "quiet time". He's not on a schedule because of the chaotic changes/life he's always lead, so quiet time is as good as it gets in regards to an early bed time. Lately, he hasn't been going to sleep until 9 or 10.
So I nurse P for the last time around 10, watch a show on the Kindle or read to Nolan and finally, he falls asleep. By this point, Z and I are exhausted and head to bead ourselves. Do the math, we've barely spent anytime together but we know that we will be up in a few hours for another nursing session and as much as we love each other, we love sleep too. So we say goodnight and float into dreamland.
P's been sleeping for 4-5 hour stretches so it hasn't been that terrible. But it's nothing like having one child; getting them to nap at the same time is almost impossible and when it actually does happen, there's so much that needs done around the house that I'm too anxious to fall asleep even if I wanted to.
I know, no one cares about piles of laundry, clumps of dog hair or other household things but I do. I like a clean house and I like organization. And although sometimes there isn't enough time for it, I really try and make time.
And then there's the blog. Some people may not understand or get it but this is MY outlet; you guys are my friends, not just readers, and I want and need the interaction I get on a daily basis. Whether it's through emails, Twitter, or some other form of social media, I crave the daily back and forth with you all. It makes me smile and yes, sometimes it becomes a lot to handle but I like being busy and feeling like I belong somewhere.
So is my life insane? Yes. It changes every single day and I never know how the day will go. Somedays I don't get to answer a single email because I want to put my phone down and give Nolan the attention he's been forced to share. Somedays he watches TV all day because that's what he feels like doing and I need to get some work done. Do I feel bad about that? A little. But if he wants to do it, then that's what he wants to do. And as my dear friend Meagan told me, I'm in survival mode right now. It won't always be like this and once P is a little older, we will have established a routine and I won't feel like I'm flying by the seat of my pants at all times.
So that's what's been going on here lately. What's new in your life?
